ednesday, May 20, 2009
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Feelings and emotions linked to addiction
by John Carcerano, author and self help addiction writer, and past sufferer.
Shame, anger, helplessness, despair, humiliation and uncertainty about providing for self or others. These can be huge triggers to cause an already unquiet mind to become even more unquiet and chemically unbalanced. Remember, it is not weak will that gets an addict caught up in their suffering cycle of using. The mind is already chemically pre-disposed to needing some chemical, either through behavior and reward or drinking and drug taking in order to "balance" it out more with ease. My brother told me long ago while I was in the throes of my drinking addiction that what I need to do is "just stop drinking, don't drink anymore". But me being an addict would never ever look at this blind advice as a "cure all". There is no "cure all". Take the booze away from an alcoholic or the heroin away from the junkie and you are still left with a person who has an unquiet and chemically imbalanced mind. They will have to gravitate immediately towards some other substance or behavior in order to find balance. Most addicts do this "balance finding" without even realizing that they are pre-disposed to the need to do this. Those with addictive personality are in a constant search of balance. Through stress reduction and understanding their own individual needs and disorders, through treatment and management an addict can arrest their addiction with other methods which are less harmful to them mentally, physically, emotionally and also less of a burden on their loved ones.
Shame, anger, helplessness, despair, humiliation and uncertainty about providing for self or others. These can be huge triggers to cause an already unquiet mind to become even more unquiet and chemically unbalanced. Remember, it is not weak will that gets an addict caught up in their suffering cycle of using. The mind is already chemically pre-disposed to needing some chemical, either through behavior and reward or drinking and drug taking in order to "balance" it out more with ease. My brother told me long ago while I was in the throes of my drinking addiction that what I need to do is "just stop drinking, don't drink anymore". But me being an addict would never ever look at this blind advice as a "cure all". There is no "cure all". Take the booze away from an alcoholic or the heroin away from the junkie and you are still left with a person who has an unquiet and chemically imbalanced mind. They will have to gravitate immediately towards some other substance or behavior in order to find balance. Most addicts do this "balance finding" without even realizing that they are pre-disposed to the need to do this. Those with addictive personality are in a constant search of balance. Through stress reduction and understanding their own individual needs and disorders, through treatment and management an addict can arrest their addiction with other methods which are less harmful to them mentally, physically, emotionally and also less of a burden on their loved ones.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Hollywood addictions
Paula Abdul admits to 12 year pain pill addiction
Ted Kennedy's cure for brain surgery is lots and lots of booze
Ted Kennedy's cure for brain surgery is lots and lots of booze
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Testimonial Emails from addicts/ex-addicts who have gotten help from "A New Journey"
Testimonial Email From A Client: Hello john carcerano psych counselor (caristancleaners), You have received a message from another user! From:xxx Subject: thank you Message: I will write more later about circumstances, but I thought I would go back and give a simplified answer of why I wanted to cry yesterday. I have never met someone so in touch with himself. ---------------------------------------------------- From:xxx
The way you can talk about your strengths with such conviction and honesty, without sounding the least bit cocky is amazing. I also don't know anyone else who could share their pain with a stranger the way that you have.
This has meant more to me than any advice you could give. I has taught me that you can give alot, but still retain part of yourself. I think when I was high all the time, it made it easier for me to deal with one thing at a time and not become overwhelmed. It also helped me feel detached from the problems.
Its harder now that I am clean, and I think I have built up a wall to protect myself. I can ignore the pain and negativity for quite a while. Then, what usually gets to me is when I see goodness. When I see someone else give freely of themself without expecting anything in return.
In real life, in touching emails, even in the poem that you sent. That's when I tend to fall apart, and allow myself to feel. So, thank you making me cry... :)
Subject: smile.
Message: John, I meant what I said. And I am really glad that email helped you as much to hear as it helped me to write it. It was the one that finally made me cry, and I cried quite a bit. But ever since I stopped, I have had a smile on my face. Even through everything else we've discussed. I hope you do too. :o)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Another testimonial consulting client:
Subject: you're so easy to talk to. thx for your insight
Message: Thanks for writing back again. The msg (about my question) really made sense. Thats the same way as I think. I think its just my environment thats making me feel out of place.
I guess I am seeking to understand myself, as you say. When you say "a seeker" are you referring to some kind of archetype from a book or something?
LOL at the bundle of enthusiasm thing you said before. Its really stress. In everything Im involved with, I get "voluntereed" to be a leader (only because noone else wants to). Home, work, & community! I'm so used to being THE positive person for everyone else.
------------------------------------- From: nikixxx Subject: Hi, regarding my friend the sociopath... Message: Thanks very much for your answer. This man has hurt me and many others. He exhibits all of the symptoms you listed, it is so sad, I feel for him. However, I am not going to be used anymore by him, he does not have a conscience..... he had a terrible childhood, no love or affection, they never even talked to each other, he had a family with 4 other siblings. His father was never seen at home, his mother was an alcoholic that beat him, and 2 of the other children. He was also abused physically by his mother's "friend."
Another testimonial consulting client
He had no chance to turn out anything near "normal." So, I tried to help him for several months to get him to therapy and meds, which didn't have much effect. However, he has no one, no friends, and his father disowned him. So, I wanted to help him, but I suffered a lot in doing this. Take care, and thank you, Niki
Reflections in Recovery
To those who are weak
Living in the now
Strength in my recovery
You are not alone
At times when I may wonder
The cure of time
Goodness and the joy it brings
Meditations in recovery
Today I am making a difference in my own little way
Life continues to evolve
Night time is your peaceful time
For that I am responsible
Sharing recovery with others is so important
Adopting humilty is a must when seeking recovery
Your life is a series of spans
The 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
People with mental illness enrich our lives
Amazing Grace
So your tired, lost, anguished upset and confused
Reflect upon some poems about friendship
Others stories of recovery from addiction
Continuing on with glory
Living in the now
Strength in my recovery
You are not alone
At times when I may wonder
The cure of time
Goodness and the joy it brings
Meditations in recovery
Today I am making a difference in my own little way
Life continues to evolve
Night time is your peaceful time
For that I am responsible
Sharing recovery with others is so important
Adopting humilty is a must when seeking recovery
Your life is a series of spans
The 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
People with mental illness enrich our lives
Amazing Grace
So your tired, lost, anguished upset and confused
Reflect upon some poems about friendship
Others stories of recovery from addiction
Continuing on with glory
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Alcohol and drug addiction help
The basics of addiction recovery
You are not alone
The three stages and two types of alcoholism
Angel dust
How to help a loved one find recovery from addiction
Heroin addiction
Addiction recovery site "A New Journey"
50 states social services websites
Alcohol and drug addiction, a form of abandonment
Alcoholism treatment with Naltrexone
What makes Alcoholics Anonymous so successful
Addiction recovery hope and help you deserve
Recognize the addiction early
Once an addict always an addict?
The six stages to recovery. Stages of change
An important word about relapses
AA or NA, is this the only way?
Keeping your patience when dealing with a loved one who is suffering
Dissecting why you become addicted
So your therapist said you need meds
The 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
Even the most hopeless do and can get well
So you are tired, lost, anguished and confused.....
Medication to help with addiction recovery
For alcohol and drug addicts, everything you do matters
Acknowledging loss of control is the first step
There will never be a single silv er bullet cure for addiction
People say "just quit cold turkey"
Plenty of drug info links
You are not alone
The three stages and two types of alcoholism
Angel dust
How to help a loved one find recovery from addiction
Heroin addiction
Addiction recovery site "A New Journey"
50 states social services websites
Alcohol and drug addiction, a form of abandonment
Alcoholism treatment with Naltrexone
What makes Alcoholics Anonymous so successful
Addiction recovery hope and help you deserve
Recognize the addiction early
Once an addict always an addict?
The six stages to recovery. Stages of change
An important word about relapses
AA or NA, is this the only way?
Keeping your patience when dealing with a loved one who is suffering
Dissecting why you become addicted
So your therapist said you need meds
The 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
Even the most hopeless do and can get well
So you are tired, lost, anguished and confused.....
Medication to help with addiction recovery
For alcohol and drug addicts, everything you do matters
Acknowledging loss of control is the first step
There will never be a single silv er bullet cure for addiction
People say "just quit cold turkey"
Plenty of drug info links
Friday, May 1, 2009
Psychological disorders associated with addiction
Chemical imbalance is not always a psychological disorder
Rush Limbaugh and addictive personality
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Anorexia explained
Anti-Social Personality
Properly treating dual diagnosis
Buddha's, AA's and psychology's answers to addiction treatment
I think I'm depressed, what should I do?
People with mental illness enrich our lives
OCD and addiction, getting into "harmony"
OCD criteria and diagnosis explained
OCD and alcoholism question and answer
More on psychological disorders and treatment with medications
Rush Limbaugh and addictive personality
Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Anorexia explained
Anti-Social Personality
Properly treating dual diagnosis
Buddha's, AA's and psychology's answers to addiction treatment
I think I'm depressed, what should I do?
People with mental illness enrich our lives
OCD and addiction, getting into "harmony"
OCD criteria and diagnosis explained
OCD and alcoholism question and answer
More on psychological disorders and treatment with medications
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
People say "just quit cold turkey, it's that easy". Ignorance of addiction is in everyone.
by John Carcerano
I have read in many books on addiction how the only way to quit is to do it cold turkey. I have also heard it said that "80% of addicts who quit, quit all at once and never look back. It's that easy" they say. They have no idea what addiction to alcohol and drugs is all about. They look at at numbers with a biased because there is much much more to finding recovery than just quitting and being well. It is a process. If they have quit and are well all of a sudden then my hat is off to them. But if they were honest about their situation they would tell you what other addictions they picked up such as smoking or eating to replace the addiction they "quit". They would tell you about the underlying issues they have discovered to be experiencing now that they are alcohol and drug addiction free. Maybe they are not telling you about their underlying psychological issues because they could be in denial about them, or they don't even recognize them, or if they did then they would not be able to sell you a book they have written in which they tell you "How easy it is to quit addiction". I have read nearly 500 books on addiction and psychological disorders and there are a great number of books that as I began reading, I quickly discovered them to be trash and nonsensical so I quickly stopped reading them. If you read a book on addiction, then read it to learn something from it. Look for books written by doctors with PHD's and read the forward of the books to determine if that is a book you want to read, does it have all the info you are looking for and if the writer does not tell you his credentials then put the book back right away. There is a process that is involved in finding recovery from alcohol and drug addiction.It's a process of getting to know yourself very well, and a process of understanding why you were drawn to addiction. Quitting is easy, you just don't use anymore. But abstaining from addiction the rest of your life is what you want to do. You need to learn how to quit and feel better so you don't use again. If you just "quit" and think it is going to be easy and work itself out now, then you are mistaken. Find out your triggers and your issues so you can quit and have a healthy mind, a healthy life and a happy existence. Work your recovery and progress in your continued recovery.
I have read in many books on addiction how the only way to quit is to do it cold turkey. I have also heard it said that "80% of addicts who quit, quit all at once and never look back. It's that easy" they say. They have no idea what addiction to alcohol and drugs is all about. They look at at numbers with a biased because there is much much more to finding recovery than just quitting and being well. It is a process. If they have quit and are well all of a sudden then my hat is off to them. But if they were honest about their situation they would tell you what other addictions they picked up such as smoking or eating to replace the addiction they "quit". They would tell you about the underlying issues they have discovered to be experiencing now that they are alcohol and drug addiction free. Maybe they are not telling you about their underlying psychological issues because they could be in denial about them, or they don't even recognize them, or if they did then they would not be able to sell you a book they have written in which they tell you "How easy it is to quit addiction". I have read nearly 500 books on addiction and psychological disorders and there are a great number of books that as I began reading, I quickly discovered them to be trash and nonsensical so I quickly stopped reading them. If you read a book on addiction, then read it to learn something from it. Look for books written by doctors with PHD's and read the forward of the books to determine if that is a book you want to read, does it have all the info you are looking for and if the writer does not tell you his credentials then put the book back right away. There is a process that is involved in finding recovery from alcohol and drug addiction.It's a process of getting to know yourself very well, and a process of understanding why you were drawn to addiction. Quitting is easy, you just don't use anymore. But abstaining from addiction the rest of your life is what you want to do. You need to learn how to quit and feel better so you don't use again. If you just "quit" and think it is going to be easy and work itself out now, then you are mistaken. Find out your triggers and your issues so you can quit and have a healthy mind, a healthy life and a happy existence. Work your recovery and progress in your continued recovery.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
There will never be a "Silver Bullet" pill to cure addiction. But our understanding of addiction has led to new treatments.
by John Carcerano
Addiction treatment is vastly improving, but there will never be one complete answer.
The "silver bullet" for addiction "cure" is not out there, but our understanding of the causes and effects of addiction is getting very fine tuned. There needs to be no biased in the treatment of addiction by professionals who treat it. An experienced mental health and addiction counselor who is well educated should be all you need to learn how to get well. The answers are there, they are complex but once understood can lead a person to recovery and mental well being. The drugs you hear about for addiction treatment are aids to help addicts recovery with less stress and discomfort. These drugs help make addiction recovery easier. They need to be complimented with proper counseling and recognition of any underlying psychological disorder.
Naltrexone and Buprenorphine is one of several treatments to help with recovery from alcohol and opiate addiction
Naltrexone/Buprenorphine helps assist the addict entering into recovery by blocking the areas of the brain that feels pleasure when they are engaging in alcohol or drug use. When these areas of the brain are blocked, the addict will have a reduced compulsion to want or need to use alcohol or drugs. buprenorphine makes the recovery process a smoother experience. When patients were administered Naltrexone/Buprenorphine they were found to have a much easier and quicker recovery time their first few weeks in rehab. The success of this medication to cut down withdrawal was very dramatic in most cases studied.
Methadone:
Methadone eliminates the withdrawal symptoms associated with heroin and other opioid drugs. Methadone has the same effects on the brain as heroin and opioids except there is no high effects from it. This enables the addict to slowly taper off of the drugs without getting sick and makes the experience more tolerant and much safer because there is no large shock to the body from severe withdrawal. I have spoken with addicts who were "tapered" off of heroin through the use of Methadone and it seems to work very well. Methadone is taken on average once every day to day and a half. Some addicts have complained about the length of time in which they were allowed to taper off of their addiction through the use of Methadone. Some doctors do not always get the proper amounts to their patients which in turn brings about a less smoother addiction withdrawal. This can commonly be the case in poor inner city hospitals where the care is less than good and where doctors usually do not take the time to get to properly know the addicts needs. There are also some opioid addicts who seem to be on Methadone for long periods of months. Every case is different and the important thing for the caring physician to do is to make sure there is proper follow up care and counseling for the newly recovering addict to address the issues associated with why they became addicted in the first place. Many Methadone patients can be on the drug for a period of several years, all depending on their particular issues associated with their recovery from Heroin or opioids.
Disulfiram or Antabuse
Another drug used in the treatment of addiction is Antabuse. When Antabuse is taken orally it has a simple purpose, and that is to make the alcoholic violently sick if they drink any alcohol. The problem with Antabuse is that the alcoholic has to choose to take their medication once a day. They may choose to go off the Antabuse in preperation for a planned drinking binge. Antabuse is a choice the drinker makes. The part that works the best with Antabuse is that the problem drinker knows they will get very sick with headaches and vomitting for several hours if they do in fact drink. It is a detterrent to drinking. Antabuse was discovered in the 1950's when an industrial plant that used Disulfiram in it's manufacturing process dicovered that when their workers went home and drank they became violently ill. It was then that the medical community decided to use the drug as a treatment for alcoholics. Medications are often discovered by accident. Disulfiram was one of them.
Lorazepam, an extremely potent anti-anxiety drug used for Heroin withdrawal.
Lorazepam is an explosively potent anti anxiety drug which is often use for Heroin addiction withdrawal to keep the addict calm. This drug is highly addicting itself and must be administered with great care to prevent the patient from getting addicted to it. It is only used within the first week or so of Heroin withdrawal. When I was a few years sober from quitting my addiction to alcohol,a friend of mine had a large bottle full of Lorazepam and i began taking it to help me with the anxiety I was having while trying to fall asleep at night. I began taking these small little pills and thought they were harmless. They were only 1mg. Before long I began taking 2 at night and then sometimes 3. 1 Lorazepam is a very powerful dose in itself. In a matter of a couple of weeks I was addicted to them and did not quickly realize this until I tried to stop. I was taking 3 1mg pills over the course of my day. I am very lucky that I caught this addiction early and was able to quit after about 3 months. But It was not a smooth ride. But I did catch it in time. One important factor to know is that an alcoholic can easily become addicted to any type of downer, Valium or opiate.
Addiction treatment is vastly improving, but there will never be one complete answer.
The "silver bullet" for addiction "cure" is not out there, but our understanding of the causes and effects of addiction is getting very fine tuned. There needs to be no biased in the treatment of addiction by professionals who treat it. An experienced mental health and addiction counselor who is well educated should be all you need to learn how to get well. The answers are there, they are complex but once understood can lead a person to recovery and mental well being. The drugs you hear about for addiction treatment are aids to help addicts recovery with less stress and discomfort. These drugs help make addiction recovery easier. They need to be complimented with proper counseling and recognition of any underlying psychological disorder.
Naltrexone and Buprenorphine is one of several treatments to help with recovery from alcohol and opiate addiction
Naltrexone/Buprenorphine helps assist the addict entering into recovery by blocking the areas of the brain that feels pleasure when they are engaging in alcohol or drug use. When these areas of the brain are blocked, the addict will have a reduced compulsion to want or need to use alcohol or drugs. buprenorphine makes the recovery process a smoother experience. When patients were administered Naltrexone/Buprenorphine they were found to have a much easier and quicker recovery time their first few weeks in rehab. The success of this medication to cut down withdrawal was very dramatic in most cases studied.
Methadone:
Methadone eliminates the withdrawal symptoms associated with heroin and other opioid drugs. Methadone has the same effects on the brain as heroin and opioids except there is no high effects from it. This enables the addict to slowly taper off of the drugs without getting sick and makes the experience more tolerant and much safer because there is no large shock to the body from severe withdrawal. I have spoken with addicts who were "tapered" off of heroin through the use of Methadone and it seems to work very well. Methadone is taken on average once every day to day and a half. Some addicts have complained about the length of time in which they were allowed to taper off of their addiction through the use of Methadone. Some doctors do not always get the proper amounts to their patients which in turn brings about a less smoother addiction withdrawal. This can commonly be the case in poor inner city hospitals where the care is less than good and where doctors usually do not take the time to get to properly know the addicts needs. There are also some opioid addicts who seem to be on Methadone for long periods of months. Every case is different and the important thing for the caring physician to do is to make sure there is proper follow up care and counseling for the newly recovering addict to address the issues associated with why they became addicted in the first place. Many Methadone patients can be on the drug for a period of several years, all depending on their particular issues associated with their recovery from Heroin or opioids.
Disulfiram or Antabuse
Another drug used in the treatment of addiction is Antabuse. When Antabuse is taken orally it has a simple purpose, and that is to make the alcoholic violently sick if they drink any alcohol. The problem with Antabuse is that the alcoholic has to choose to take their medication once a day. They may choose to go off the Antabuse in preperation for a planned drinking binge. Antabuse is a choice the drinker makes. The part that works the best with Antabuse is that the problem drinker knows they will get very sick with headaches and vomitting for several hours if they do in fact drink. It is a detterrent to drinking. Antabuse was discovered in the 1950's when an industrial plant that used Disulfiram in it's manufacturing process dicovered that when their workers went home and drank they became violently ill. It was then that the medical community decided to use the drug as a treatment for alcoholics. Medications are often discovered by accident. Disulfiram was one of them.
Lorazepam, an extremely potent anti-anxiety drug used for Heroin withdrawal.
Lorazepam is an explosively potent anti anxiety drug which is often use for Heroin addiction withdrawal to keep the addict calm. This drug is highly addicting itself and must be administered with great care to prevent the patient from getting addicted to it. It is only used within the first week or so of Heroin withdrawal. When I was a few years sober from quitting my addiction to alcohol,a friend of mine had a large bottle full of Lorazepam and i began taking it to help me with the anxiety I was having while trying to fall asleep at night. I began taking these small little pills and thought they were harmless. They were only 1mg. Before long I began taking 2 at night and then sometimes 3. 1 Lorazepam is a very powerful dose in itself. In a matter of a couple of weeks I was addicted to them and did not quickly realize this until I tried to stop. I was taking 3 1mg pills over the course of my day. I am very lucky that I caught this addiction early and was able to quit after about 3 months. But It was not a smooth ride. But I did catch it in time. One important factor to know is that an alcoholic can easily become addicted to any type of downer, Valium or opiate.
Acknowledging loss of control is the first step to getting control of yourself again.
by John Carcerano
Getting past your ego and also denial is the the most important step/decision you can make to accepting the fact that you need help. Knowing that you need help with an addiction or psychological disorder is the way to allowing others into your life who are able to help and guide you to recovery. An ego will stop you from recovery so don't worry what others may think about you once they find out you are an addict or mental health sufferer. What they think should not matter. Anyone who would tease you or look down on you does not need to be in your life. Be focused only on your own well being, everything else does not matter at this point. Acceptance of your true situation will allow you to be free to make the decisions necessary to let other trained professionals help you. Being honest with yourself is the only way. From that point on things will flow much easier in your recovery. Think about what your getting well will mean to your family and close loved ones, and think only of that. Think about what getting well will mean for your standard of living, of how your suffering will be relieved. You are all that matters! You are human and have human frailties. 1 person in 3 are suffering from an addiction. 1 person in 5 suffer from a psychological disorder. The stigma that exists about these issues are unwarranted. What is warranted is the happiness you and your loved ones greatly deserve. Get the help you need and do so with your head held high, do so because need to and you want to and for no other reason. Do not let anyone or anything get in your way. Acknowledge you have a problem and that you need help, and you will find a ton of others willing to help you get that help. There is a wonderful system out there and it works, whether you are rich or poor. I promise you it's there. Admit it, that's all you do to get started. Now get started.
Getting past your ego and also denial is the the most important step/decision you can make to accepting the fact that you need help. Knowing that you need help with an addiction or psychological disorder is the way to allowing others into your life who are able to help and guide you to recovery. An ego will stop you from recovery so don't worry what others may think about you once they find out you are an addict or mental health sufferer. What they think should not matter. Anyone who would tease you or look down on you does not need to be in your life. Be focused only on your own well being, everything else does not matter at this point. Acceptance of your true situation will allow you to be free to make the decisions necessary to let other trained professionals help you. Being honest with yourself is the only way. From that point on things will flow much easier in your recovery. Think about what your getting well will mean to your family and close loved ones, and think only of that. Think about what getting well will mean for your standard of living, of how your suffering will be relieved. You are all that matters! You are human and have human frailties. 1 person in 3 are suffering from an addiction. 1 person in 5 suffer from a psychological disorder. The stigma that exists about these issues are unwarranted. What is warranted is the happiness you and your loved ones greatly deserve. Get the help you need and do so with your head held high, do so because need to and you want to and for no other reason. Do not let anyone or anything get in your way. Acknowledge you have a problem and that you need help, and you will find a ton of others willing to help you get that help. There is a wonderful system out there and it works, whether you are rich or poor. I promise you it's there. Admit it, that's all you do to get started. Now get started.
Friday, April 17, 2009
For addiction to drugs and alcohol, EVERYTHING you do is medication that helps you stay in recovery,....Let me explain
When you are battling an addiction and entering into recovery it will take more than just abstinence to keep you clean and healthy. Everything you do after you quit must be geared towards your recovery. The foods you eat and the fluids you drink (non-alcoholic) all will help you with staying in recovery. Caffeine's in your soda or coffee can make you more jittery than you may be. You are probably going to have sleepless nights after you first abstain from drugs or alcohol because your body is not used to being chemical free because your cells have adapted to the constant pummeling they were getting. They have to adjust back and this is no simple process. To make your recovery easier you have to monitor and control your stress levels so you don't relapse. You have to kick it back a few notches and just learn to "take it all in". Recovery is new and you have to learn how to live it. If you eat too much sugar or carbs your body could become lethargic and you will feel tired, achy and depressed. 8 years into my abstinence I found myself totally binge eating. I guess it was a combination of nerves and anxiety. I was eating a lot of pasta everyday, whole bags of oatmeal cookies and I just could not stop. I knew I was getting fat but it was winter and it did not bother me because I thought I would just starve diet in the spring to lose it all. But all that binging on carbs was causing my bodies sugar levels to greatly increase. I was feeling really painful in my joints and I did not want to get out of bed. I was then also starting to feel very depressed. It really scared me. I thought old age was settling in on me, but I was only 38. Binging on all them carbs had brought this on me. I was even feeling very faint at times. Not recognizing my problem could have led to a relapse in my drinking alcohol. Watching what you eat and drink is very important in your healthy continued recovery. You truly must live your recovery. By eating a proper diet and living a more stressless life you will truly find your triggers to relapse will be greatly diminished. You want to not just be alcohol and drug free, you also want to be in harmony with all that is around you. Blend and be calm. Enjoy your recovery. Live it and make it endure.
High blood sugar symptoms: High blood sugar may produce few or no symptoms. When there are symptoms, they may be dry mouth, thirst, frequent urination, urination during the night, blurry vision, fatigue or drowsiness, weight loss, or increased appetite. courtesy of medicinenet.com
High blood sugar symptoms: High blood sugar may produce few or no symptoms. When there are symptoms, they may be dry mouth, thirst, frequent urination, urination during the night, blurry vision, fatigue or drowsiness, weight loss, or increased appetite. courtesy of medicinenet.com
Low blood sugar symptoms, Also known as Hypoglycemia:
Trembling, clammy skin, anxiety, rapid heart beat, sweating, irritability, hunger.
Now look at the symptoms of low blood sugar and high blood sugar and understand what effects that these symptoms can have on your continued recovery.
In my upcoming book "A New Journey" recovery from alcohol and drug addiction, I will have a bit more to say about diet, stress, being in balance and harmony.
Medication to help ease addiction recovery is not as simple as some make it out to be, but under the proper guidance it greatly helps Recovery,
I will expand more on this in a later blog,.........Read this article from CNN.,.........................
.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
By Caleb Hellerman
CNN Senior Medical Producer
CENTRAL FALLS, Rhode Island (CNN) -- A no-frills bar called Goober's, just north of Providence, Rhode Island, is probably the last place you'd expect to find a debate over cutting-edge addiction therapy. But this is where Walter Kent, a retired mechanic, spends his Fridays. He helps in the kitchen and hangs out in the bar, catching up with old friends.
Walter Kent talks to Dr. Sanjay Gupta about how the drug naltrexone has helped keep him sober.
Most addiction specialists would call this playing with fire, or worse. That's because for more than 30 years, Kent was a hard-core alcoholic. His drinks of choice were Heineken beer and Jacob Ginger brandy, but anything with alcohol would do.
"It's like a little kid wanting a piece of candy. You see it, you want the taste of it." He closes his eyes and sniffs the air, remembering the feeling. "You can be by yourself, and all of a sudden get even a hint of alcohol, just the smell of it, and say, 'Oh, I need a drink.' That sensation is not something you can get rid of."
But today, Kent isn't tempted in the least. He says the credit goes to a prescription medication -- a pill called naltrexone. It's part of a new generation of anti-addiction drugs that may turn the world of rehab on its head.
Dr. Mark Willenbring, who oversees scientific research at the National Institute on Alcoholism and Alcohol Abuse, says alcoholism has reached a point similar to one depression reached 30 years ago -- when the development of Prozac and other antidepressants took mental health care out of the asylum and put it in homes and doctors' offices.
"There will be a 'Prozac moment,' " Willenbring says, "when primary care doctors start handling functional alcoholics." Video Watch Dr. Gupta: Are you an alcoholic quiz »
Among the findings that are causing excitement:
'Addiction: Life on the Edge'
Dr. Sanjay Gupta follows a mother, a writer, a student and a husband. Each is an addict on a journey through recovery and relapse.
Sat & Sun, 8 p.m. ET on CNN
see full schedule »
• A study led by Dr. Bankole Johnson of the University of Virginia found that topiramate (Topamax) -- already used to treat epilepsy and migraines -- reduced the number of days on which alcoholics drank heavily, by 25 percent more than among alcoholics who got just therapy.
• A federally funded study known as COMBINE compared cognitive-behavioral therapy alone with therapy along with naltrexone. Patients receiving both were more likely to stay abstinent and drank less if they did relapse.
These findings highlight what's become increasingly clear: Addiction is a brain disease, not just a failure of willpower. Naltrexone and topiramate have slightly different mechanisms, but both seem to block the release of brain chemicals that are linked to pleasure and excitement. Unlike earlier drugs used to treat alcoholics, neither is addictive or carries significant side effects. It does appear that each might work better in certain subgroups -- topiramate for repeat relapsers, and naltrexone in people with a strong family history of alcoholism. Interactive: Addiction's lure to the brain »
Johnson is a paid consultant to the company that makes Topamax, but his study appeared in the Journal of the American Medical Association and he says other medications can also work well. "I think everybody who's an alcoholic should be given medication if they're willing to take it," he says. "It's been shown over and over with research studies that effects of medicine are over and above that of therapy. And if you're not getting the medicine, it's a bit like having one hand tied behind your back."
Don't Miss
* Recovery schools a 'soft landing' for post-rehab teens
Before he found naltrexone, Kent had tried to quit drinking more times than he can remember. "I was the kind of person who only drank if he was alone or with somebody. Other than that, it was never a problem," he jokes now. He did two stints in residential rehab programs and went to countless AA meetings, but nothing worked. Kent is a giant of a man -- he stands a broad-shouldered 6 feet 5 inches tall, and has two sons who played professional basketball in Israel -- but for most of his life, he couldn't find the strength to put down the bottle. Video Watch Dr. Gupta: Can a pill help you go cold turkey? »
It got worse in 2000, after an injury from falling off a ladder forced him to stop working. Depressed and in pain, with time on his hands, Kent began boozing from 8 o'clock in the morning, every morning. It went on a few months until his wife, a woman he'd known since grammar school, handed him an ad from a newspaper and an ultimatum: "She said, 'You're killing the marriage, and you're killing yourself,' " Kent said. " ' Get help or I'm gone.' "
The ad was recruiting alcoholics for research at Roger Williams Hospital, part of Brown University. Kent signed up. It was part of the COMBINE study. Kent got 16 weekly visits and also something most addicts never hear about: medication. This time, he stayed sober, even after his doctor took him off naltrexone. That was more than eight years ago. Video Watch Walter Kent talk about his struggle with alcohol »
Despite studies showing effectiveness, established rehab programs have been slow to adopt the use of medication. At Hazelden in Minneapolis, Minnesota, a small proportion of patients receive anti-addiction drugs, but medical director Dr. Kevin Clark says the traditional model -- based on intensive therapy and the 12 steps popularized by Alcoholics Anonymous -- is still best. "It is a disease of the brain, but it's a multifaceted disease. It has a spiritual component, a behavioral component to it," says Clark. "Our experience tells us that having the network of support and recovery is what really makes the difference."
John Schwarzlose, executive director of the Betty Ford Center, echoes that but takes a more stringent approach. No patients at Betty Ford receive anti-addiction drugs as part of treatment, although a handful of long-time addicts may be referred to a prescribing physician once their stay is over. "Where we battle with [the National Institute on Alcoholism and Alcohol Abuse] is when they say we have trials of a new drug, and then proclaim this is a treatment for alcoholism," says Schwarzlose. "They're smart people, but they're missing how complex this disease is."
Health Library
* MayoClinic.com: Addiction
Schwarzlose argues that Willenbring and Johnson are using the wrong measure of success. He says abstinence is the only true measuring stick -- that an alcoholic who is drinking less is just at a way station on the road to relapse. "Naltrexone has reduced drinking, but once you're addicted, there is no such thing as 'OK' drinking. This is one of those cases where there's a real schism between the research and actual practice."
This attitude frustrates Willenbring, who estimates that in the United States only one addict in 10 has even heard about medication options. "In most cases, the treatment is entirely nonmedical. Most people are not even told about the medications that are available for treating alcohol dependence, and I think that's a crime."
advertisement
Still, medication is slowly creeping into mainstream addiction therapy. One big advocate is Percy Menzies, a pharmacist and former sales representative for DuPont, which developed naltrexone. His St. Louis, Missouri-based Recovery Centers for America treats patients in an on-site hospital, then refers them to outside physicians for follow-up treatment. Along with therapy, virtually every patient is given Vivitrol, a long-lasting form of naltrexone that's given monthly by injection.
Kent says naltrexone saved his life. When the COMBINE program was over, Kent's doctor told him to call if he felt the old need for a drink coming back. But it never came. "I have yet to go back and say, 'I have an urge for a drink,' " says Kent, lounging in Goober's. "[My friends] will offer, 'You want a drink?' And I say, 'No, I'm fine. I'll have a soda.' I'm fine with that. Because when there's no urge, no craving, it doesn't bother me. I'm living proof this can happen."
.>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
By Caleb Hellerman
CNN Senior Medical Producer
CENTRAL FALLS, Rhode Island (CNN) -- A no-frills bar called Goober's, just north of Providence, Rhode Island, is probably the last place you'd expect to find a debate over cutting-edge addiction therapy. But this is where Walter Kent, a retired mechanic, spends his Fridays. He helps in the kitchen and hangs out in the bar, catching up with old friends.
Walter Kent talks to Dr. Sanjay Gupta about how the drug naltrexone has helped keep him sober.
Most addiction specialists would call this playing with fire, or worse. That's because for more than 30 years, Kent was a hard-core alcoholic. His drinks of choice were Heineken beer and Jacob Ginger brandy, but anything with alcohol would do.
"It's like a little kid wanting a piece of candy. You see it, you want the taste of it." He closes his eyes and sniffs the air, remembering the feeling. "You can be by yourself, and all of a sudden get even a hint of alcohol, just the smell of it, and say, 'Oh, I need a drink.' That sensation is not something you can get rid of."
But today, Kent isn't tempted in the least. He says the credit goes to a prescription medication -- a pill called naltrexone. It's part of a new generation of anti-addiction drugs that may turn the world of rehab on its head.
Dr. Mark Willenbring, who oversees scientific research at the National Institute on Alcoholism and Alcohol Abuse, says alcoholism has reached a point similar to one depression reached 30 years ago -- when the development of Prozac and other antidepressants took mental health care out of the asylum and put it in homes and doctors' offices.
"There will be a 'Prozac moment,' " Willenbring says, "when primary care doctors start handling functional alcoholics." Video Watch Dr. Gupta: Are you an alcoholic quiz »
Among the findings that are causing excitement:
'Addiction: Life on the Edge'
Dr. Sanjay Gupta follows a mother, a writer, a student and a husband. Each is an addict on a journey through recovery and relapse.
Sat & Sun, 8 p.m. ET on CNN
see full schedule »
• A study led by Dr. Bankole Johnson of the University of Virginia found that topiramate (Topamax) -- already used to treat epilepsy and migraines -- reduced the number of days on which alcoholics drank heavily, by 25 percent more than among alcoholics who got just therapy.
• A federally funded study known as COMBINE compared cognitive-behavioral therapy alone with therapy along with naltrexone. Patients receiving both were more likely to stay abstinent and drank less if they did relapse.
These findings highlight what's become increasingly clear: Addiction is a brain disease, not just a failure of willpower. Naltrexone and topiramate have slightly different mechanisms, but both seem to block the release of brain chemicals that are linked to pleasure and excitement. Unlike earlier drugs used to treat alcoholics, neither is addictive or carries significant side effects. It does appear that each might work better in certain subgroups -- topiramate for repeat relapsers, and naltrexone in people with a strong family history of alcoholism. Interactive: Addiction's lure to the brain »
Johnson is a paid consultant to the company that makes Topamax, but his study appeared in the Journal of the American Medical Association and he says other medications can also work well. "I think everybody who's an alcoholic should be given medication if they're willing to take it," he says. "It's been shown over and over with research studies that effects of medicine are over and above that of therapy. And if you're not getting the medicine, it's a bit like having one hand tied behind your back."
Don't Miss
* Recovery schools a 'soft landing' for post-rehab teens
Before he found naltrexone, Kent had tried to quit drinking more times than he can remember. "I was the kind of person who only drank if he was alone or with somebody. Other than that, it was never a problem," he jokes now. He did two stints in residential rehab programs and went to countless AA meetings, but nothing worked. Kent is a giant of a man -- he stands a broad-shouldered 6 feet 5 inches tall, and has two sons who played professional basketball in Israel -- but for most of his life, he couldn't find the strength to put down the bottle. Video Watch Dr. Gupta: Can a pill help you go cold turkey? »
It got worse in 2000, after an injury from falling off a ladder forced him to stop working. Depressed and in pain, with time on his hands, Kent began boozing from 8 o'clock in the morning, every morning. It went on a few months until his wife, a woman he'd known since grammar school, handed him an ad from a newspaper and an ultimatum: "She said, 'You're killing the marriage, and you're killing yourself,' " Kent said. " ' Get help or I'm gone.' "
The ad was recruiting alcoholics for research at Roger Williams Hospital, part of Brown University. Kent signed up. It was part of the COMBINE study. Kent got 16 weekly visits and also something most addicts never hear about: medication. This time, he stayed sober, even after his doctor took him off naltrexone. That was more than eight years ago. Video Watch Walter Kent talk about his struggle with alcohol »
Despite studies showing effectiveness, established rehab programs have been slow to adopt the use of medication. At Hazelden in Minneapolis, Minnesota, a small proportion of patients receive anti-addiction drugs, but medical director Dr. Kevin Clark says the traditional model -- based on intensive therapy and the 12 steps popularized by Alcoholics Anonymous -- is still best. "It is a disease of the brain, but it's a multifaceted disease. It has a spiritual component, a behavioral component to it," says Clark. "Our experience tells us that having the network of support and recovery is what really makes the difference."
John Schwarzlose, executive director of the Betty Ford Center, echoes that but takes a more stringent approach. No patients at Betty Ford receive anti-addiction drugs as part of treatment, although a handful of long-time addicts may be referred to a prescribing physician once their stay is over. "Where we battle with [the National Institute on Alcoholism and Alcohol Abuse] is when they say we have trials of a new drug, and then proclaim this is a treatment for alcoholism," says Schwarzlose. "They're smart people, but they're missing how complex this disease is."
Health Library
* MayoClinic.com: Addiction
Schwarzlose argues that Willenbring and Johnson are using the wrong measure of success. He says abstinence is the only true measuring stick -- that an alcoholic who is drinking less is just at a way station on the road to relapse. "Naltrexone has reduced drinking, but once you're addicted, there is no such thing as 'OK' drinking. This is one of those cases where there's a real schism between the research and actual practice."
This attitude frustrates Willenbring, who estimates that in the United States only one addict in 10 has even heard about medication options. "In most cases, the treatment is entirely nonmedical. Most people are not even told about the medications that are available for treating alcohol dependence, and I think that's a crime."
advertisement
Still, medication is slowly creeping into mainstream addiction therapy. One big advocate is Percy Menzies, a pharmacist and former sales representative for DuPont, which developed naltrexone. His St. Louis, Missouri-based Recovery Centers for America treats patients in an on-site hospital, then refers them to outside physicians for follow-up treatment. Along with therapy, virtually every patient is given Vivitrol, a long-lasting form of naltrexone that's given monthly by injection.
Kent says naltrexone saved his life. When the COMBINE program was over, Kent's doctor told him to call if he felt the old need for a drink coming back. But it never came. "I have yet to go back and say, 'I have an urge for a drink,' " says Kent, lounging in Goober's. "[My friends] will offer, 'You want a drink?' And I say, 'No, I'm fine. I'll have a soda.' I'm fine with that. Because when there's no urge, no craving, it doesn't bother me. I'm living proof this can happen."
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
OCD and Alcoholism QUESTION:
Question:
Hi John,
It's been a draining couple of days. He's finally stopped drinking after pawning his laptop yesterday to buy more alcohol. His parents have basically been MIA in the whole situation. Apparently he told them that he wanted to go to detox, which I don't really think is the answer. Now that he is sobering up he realizes he didn't mean it, nor does he remember saying it. Tomorrow he has an appt with his psychiatrist and he will talk about new meds then. He did tell me it was the stress of school and other things that came together all at once. We've talked about some of the things you talked about, nutrition, a routine, etc. He agrees and is willing to try anything to get better.
Your emails have really given me hope and I thank you. I was feeling very inadequate as far as this whole situation, but you helped me see that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It will just take time and patience. It helps that he knows he needs to make changes and that he knows he has a problem. I think he's feeling more hopeful than he has in awhile. Part of the problem is that no one ever sat him down and really explained the whole OCD thing to him. They just kinda of said "here, take this pill, you'll be fine". Which in my opinion isn't the best kind of care. So he's had no idea that his OCD can influence his desire to use alcohol. Maybe he will finally realize he isn't a bad person choosing to do bad things. Maybe he will finally realize that he has a mental health issue that needs to be addressed and maintained. Knowledge is power. The more he knows the more he can control it, instead of it controlling him.
I ordered those books you suggested. I plan on taking them with me when I see him and we'll go over them together. Hopefully, his parents will be interested in reading them also. I also found a support group for people dealing with mental health and addiction issues. I plan on taking him. He needs to know that what he is going through, others go through too. He needs to know he isn't alone and shouldn't feel ashamed.
I have known him since he was 12 years old. He was a quiet little boy, full of mischief. I know that underneath all of this that person is still there. I plan on finding that person again. Since his family won't step up and do what needs to be done, I will. You have made that decision easy for me. I won't let him fall through the cracks and live this way anymore. Life isn't meant to be lived this way. He wasn't meant to live this way. He deserves to live a happy life. I think this is a new start for both of us. You have given me hope and in turn I've given him hope.
Once again thank you! I hope that if I have more questions, you don't mind if I ask them. At least until we get on the right road. :)
Answer: From John Carcerano
The 12 year old mischief maker? It's ironic you say that because as I was growing up that's what my aunt used to call me. My school teachers said quite another thing about me during the many conferences they had with my father. There may be a connection to the OCD, addiction and childhood "mischief". Addiction is something that can be "predicted" in childhood. Actually it isn't prediction at all. There are signs to addiction in pre-teen children that scream out "future addict" . It's humbling to see that you have known this man since his youth and have been there with him for a long time as you grew up. An addict it seems is always an addict. When they quit one addiction they will shift to another. I am sure if you were to analyze your bf in his childhood, you would see that the environmental, genetic and psychological factors for him to become an addict were in play even as he was in his adolescence. People who are diagnosed with a psychological disorder actually have on average 31/2 disorders. A1/2 of disorder is possible by having only 50% of the symptoms needed for a full diagnosis. They call this a spectrum disorder. Each disorders have a wide range of similar disorders associated with them. I am trying to get to a point and stay on track as I address your boyfriends issues. There are many times you will hear about a misdiagnosis of a person for having a disorder that they in reality do not have. That misdiagnosis happens for a variety of reasons. The psychiatrist may not be that educated on the many disorders, or they may hear partial symptoms and make too fast of a diagnosis. For instance, Bi-polar Disorder has 60% of the symptoms as Schizophrenia. Was your boyfriend unable to sit still in class and properly concentrate? If so, that I am sure was due to the anxiety from his OCD. OCD is mostly evident at a very early age. It rarely ever suddenly afflicts anyone after puberty. Before I started drinking at 15 years old, I was having problems with battling my weight. When I was in 4th grade I had a size 36 waist and I was 4 feet 11 inches tall. Looking back now, it was quite evident that my addiction was present at that early age. I shunned alcohol and drugs as much as any child in 4th grade would, but the anxiety, environmental, psychological and physiological factors that had made me a teenage alcoholic were also making me a pre-teen over weight child. When I began drinking my weight got down to a normal size. And I have been thin ever since 15 years old. I was also thin up to age 8 or 9. Even now as I have been alcohol free for the last 15 years, I still have many periods when I will binge on food often. Only I have learned to eat non fattening foods like salads, cucumbers, air popped popcorn etc. And I work out also and walk a lot. So I do remain thin. Just because I am not a drinker anymore, that does not mean my addiction is over. It will never be over. An addict has what is called an unquiet mind. I won't go too deeply into this, but you can read these two links here LINK ONE , LINK TWO , where I explain it more. But when your boyfriend does quit drinking for good, he will still have an unquiet mind. The unquiet mind is what made/makes him an addict. He will need to learn to channel his addiction to a less harmful one. Whether he guides this channeling and switching of his drinking addiction after he quits, will be up to him. If he does not guide it elsewhere then it will guide him elsewhere whether he is aware of it or not. In Alcoholics Anonymous they call the newly recovered alcoholics feelings and new life as having to deal with "a dry drunk". The way that your boyfriend is before he drinks, is the person he is going to have to learn to deal with the rest of his life. You tell me that he is a binge drinker. Well so was I. I drank straight out of a half pint bottle of booze all the time. I did this because it helped to sedate "my unquiet mind". A mind that was unquiet due to the intensity of thought from my OCD and other environmental and genetic factors that made me very agitated physically and psychologically. I cannot even handle caffeine in my soda or in my coffee. I'm high strung with out caffeine. I will bet that your boyfriend has many of the same high strung feelings that I experience, due to his having an anxiety disorder and an addictiveness to alcohol as a way to bring calm. Your boyfriend will also become quickly addicted to downers such as Valium etc. He must always stay away from that the same way he will have to stay away from alcohol. Downers would be deadly for him to take. Especially if he ever mixed them with alcohol. He needs to live a new and "managed lifestyle" where he is aware of all of his triggers and away from all the places and people he hangs with when he drinks. If all his childhood friends are drinkers and druggies, he needs to leave them and find new friends or he will never quit his addiction to alcohol. Never. When he quits drinking for good, he has to make sure that all his medications are working properly, he needs to control his stress and take new routes to solutions in his day to day life that are more calming in their approach. He needs to live a life of managed care. It may sound boring or difficult for him to have to live like that, but it really isn't. It becomes a habit as he practices it over and over again. He will learn how to be a much more calmer person, and he will also add years to his life. Anxiety is no good on the physical body. Stress kills. It causes heart attack and stroke, and it also puts a heavy strain on the bodies organs which will lead to earlier disease and organ failure. There is a lot to digest here I know, but it really is not that much when he decides to make the changes needed in his life to find and stay in recovery from his alcoholism and anxiety disorder. Also tell him what he is doing to you by draining you and driving you crazy. Tough love is the best and make him feel guilty, but don't drive him over the edge. I also wanted to mention that besides my addiction to alcohol, and my binge eating at times, I also have had extended periods of what I call borderline anorexia. People who have known me during these anorexic periods of mine have often questioned me to ask if I was sick because my weight was down to as low as 116 pounds. The anorexia was tied to my OCD. Anorexia is a spectrum disorder of OCD, but anorexia is not always tied to OCD in every case. So I have been alcohol free for 15 years but I still have binge periods of eating and rarer moments now (thank God) of anorexic periods. So I am not completely "cured", but I am alcohol and drug free for 15 years (though there was about a 1 1/2 year period of drug use during this 15 years) and I AM HEALTHY AND MY LIFE IS MORE STRESS FREE AND STABLE THAN EVER BEFORE. This is what your bf should hope to accomplish once he makes the determination and reaches out for the help and support of others in recovery. He will never be perfect, but he can and will be a hell of a lot happier and so will those around him. There are a lot of people in AA and other groups who will just surround him with caring information and guidance and friendship once he makes the comittment to a sober way of life. It's a proud feeling to get beyond a severe addiction and that is something he can look forward too. He has to learn to dismiss his parents critisizm and just be the best he can be with a dedicated woman like you there to support him. What will greatly help I think, is as long as you tell him that what his parents think is not important to you, just that he gets well and stays better and stable is all you want and you will be proud of him for that. Sincerely, John anj
Hi John,
It's been a draining couple of days. He's finally stopped drinking after pawning his laptop yesterday to buy more alcohol. His parents have basically been MIA in the whole situation. Apparently he told them that he wanted to go to detox, which I don't really think is the answer. Now that he is sobering up he realizes he didn't mean it, nor does he remember saying it. Tomorrow he has an appt with his psychiatrist and he will talk about new meds then. He did tell me it was the stress of school and other things that came together all at once. We've talked about some of the things you talked about, nutrition, a routine, etc. He agrees and is willing to try anything to get better.
Your emails have really given me hope and I thank you. I was feeling very inadequate as far as this whole situation, but you helped me see that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It will just take time and patience. It helps that he knows he needs to make changes and that he knows he has a problem. I think he's feeling more hopeful than he has in awhile. Part of the problem is that no one ever sat him down and really explained the whole OCD thing to him. They just kinda of said "here, take this pill, you'll be fine". Which in my opinion isn't the best kind of care. So he's had no idea that his OCD can influence his desire to use alcohol. Maybe he will finally realize he isn't a bad person choosing to do bad things. Maybe he will finally realize that he has a mental health issue that needs to be addressed and maintained. Knowledge is power. The more he knows the more he can control it, instead of it controlling him.
I ordered those books you suggested. I plan on taking them with me when I see him and we'll go over them together. Hopefully, his parents will be interested in reading them also. I also found a support group for people dealing with mental health and addiction issues. I plan on taking him. He needs to know that what he is going through, others go through too. He needs to know he isn't alone and shouldn't feel ashamed.
I have known him since he was 12 years old. He was a quiet little boy, full of mischief. I know that underneath all of this that person is still there. I plan on finding that person again. Since his family won't step up and do what needs to be done, I will. You have made that decision easy for me. I won't let him fall through the cracks and live this way anymore. Life isn't meant to be lived this way. He wasn't meant to live this way. He deserves to live a happy life. I think this is a new start for both of us. You have given me hope and in turn I've given him hope.
Once again thank you! I hope that if I have more questions, you don't mind if I ask them. At least until we get on the right road. :)
Answer: From John Carcerano
The 12 year old mischief maker? It's ironic you say that because as I was growing up that's what my aunt used to call me. My school teachers said quite another thing about me during the many conferences they had with my father. There may be a connection to the OCD, addiction and childhood "mischief". Addiction is something that can be "predicted" in childhood. Actually it isn't prediction at all. There are signs to addiction in pre-teen children that scream out "future addict" . It's humbling to see that you have known this man since his youth and have been there with him for a long time as you grew up. An addict it seems is always an addict. When they quit one addiction they will shift to another. I am sure if you were to analyze your bf in his childhood, you would see that the environmental, genetic and psychological factors for him to become an addict were in play even as he was in his adolescence. People who are diagnosed with a psychological disorder actually have on average 31/2 disorders. A1/2 of disorder is possible by having only 50% of the symptoms needed for a full diagnosis. They call this a spectrum disorder. Each disorders have a wide range of similar disorders associated with them. I am trying to get to a point and stay on track as I address your boyfriends issues. There are many times you will hear about a misdiagnosis of a person for having a disorder that they in reality do not have. That misdiagnosis happens for a variety of reasons. The psychiatrist may not be that educated on the many disorders, or they may hear partial symptoms and make too fast of a diagnosis. For instance, Bi-polar Disorder has 60% of the symptoms as Schizophrenia. Was your boyfriend unable to sit still in class and properly concentrate? If so, that I am sure was due to the anxiety from his OCD. OCD is mostly evident at a very early age. It rarely ever suddenly afflicts anyone after puberty. Before I started drinking at 15 years old, I was having problems with battling my weight. When I was in 4th grade I had a size 36 waist and I was 4 feet 11 inches tall. Looking back now, it was quite evident that my addiction was present at that early age. I shunned alcohol and drugs as much as any child in 4th grade would, but the anxiety, environmental, psychological and physiological factors that had made me a teenage alcoholic were also making me a pre-teen over weight child. When I began drinking my weight got down to a normal size. And I have been thin ever since 15 years old. I was also thin up to age 8 or 9. Even now as I have been alcohol free for the last 15 years, I still have many periods when I will binge on food often. Only I have learned to eat non fattening foods like salads, cucumbers, air popped popcorn etc. And I work out also and walk a lot. So I do remain thin. Just because I am not a drinker anymore, that does not mean my addiction is over. It will never be over. An addict has what is called an unquiet mind. I won't go too deeply into this, but you can read these two links here LINK ONE , LINK TWO , where I explain it more. But when your boyfriend does quit drinking for good, he will still have an unquiet mind. The unquiet mind is what made/makes him an addict. He will need to learn to channel his addiction to a less harmful one. Whether he guides this channeling and switching of his drinking addiction after he quits, will be up to him. If he does not guide it elsewhere then it will guide him elsewhere whether he is aware of it or not. In Alcoholics Anonymous they call the newly recovered alcoholics feelings and new life as having to deal with "a dry drunk". The way that your boyfriend is before he drinks, is the person he is going to have to learn to deal with the rest of his life. You tell me that he is a binge drinker. Well so was I. I drank straight out of a half pint bottle of booze all the time. I did this because it helped to sedate "my unquiet mind". A mind that was unquiet due to the intensity of thought from my OCD and other environmental and genetic factors that made me very agitated physically and psychologically. I cannot even handle caffeine in my soda or in my coffee. I'm high strung with out caffeine. I will bet that your boyfriend has many of the same high strung feelings that I experience, due to his having an anxiety disorder and an addictiveness to alcohol as a way to bring calm. Your boyfriend will also become quickly addicted to downers such as Valium etc. He must always stay away from that the same way he will have to stay away from alcohol. Downers would be deadly for him to take. Especially if he ever mixed them with alcohol. He needs to live a new and "managed lifestyle" where he is aware of all of his triggers and away from all the places and people he hangs with when he drinks. If all his childhood friends are drinkers and druggies, he needs to leave them and find new friends or he will never quit his addiction to alcohol. Never. When he quits drinking for good, he has to make sure that all his medications are working properly, he needs to control his stress and take new routes to solutions in his day to day life that are more calming in their approach. He needs to live a life of managed care. It may sound boring or difficult for him to have to live like that, but it really isn't. It becomes a habit as he practices it over and over again. He will learn how to be a much more calmer person, and he will also add years to his life. Anxiety is no good on the physical body. Stress kills. It causes heart attack and stroke, and it also puts a heavy strain on the bodies organs which will lead to earlier disease and organ failure. There is a lot to digest here I know, but it really is not that much when he decides to make the changes needed in his life to find and stay in recovery from his alcoholism and anxiety disorder. Also tell him what he is doing to you by draining you and driving you crazy. Tough love is the best and make him feel guilty, but don't drive him over the edge. I also wanted to mention that besides my addiction to alcohol, and my binge eating at times, I also have had extended periods of what I call borderline anorexia. People who have known me during these anorexic periods of mine have often questioned me to ask if I was sick because my weight was down to as low as 116 pounds. The anorexia was tied to my OCD. Anorexia is a spectrum disorder of OCD, but anorexia is not always tied to OCD in every case. So I have been alcohol free for 15 years but I still have binge periods of eating and rarer moments now (thank God) of anorexic periods. So I am not completely "cured", but I am alcohol and drug free for 15 years (though there was about a 1 1/2 year period of drug use during this 15 years) and I AM HEALTHY AND MY LIFE IS MORE STRESS FREE AND STABLE THAN EVER BEFORE. This is what your bf should hope to accomplish once he makes the determination and reaches out for the help and support of others in recovery. He will never be perfect, but he can and will be a hell of a lot happier and so will those around him. There are a lot of people in AA and other groups who will just surround him with caring information and guidance and friendship once he makes the comittment to a sober way of life. It's a proud feeling to get beyond a severe addiction and that is something he can look forward too. He has to learn to dismiss his parents critisizm and just be the best he can be with a dedicated woman like you there to support him. What will greatly help I think, is as long as you tell him that what his parents think is not important to you, just that he gets well and stays better and stable is all you want and you will be proud of him for that. Sincerely, John anj
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Reflect upon some "poems about friendship" and reflect upon the friendships you have today,....They are precious as they help you through another day
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
OCD and addiction. Getting into "harmony" is the key to getting and staying well.
QUESTION: answered by John Carcerano
My bf has a problem with drinking and OCD, can you help me?
Hi John,
Thank you for responding. I'll give you a bit of background. I realize you aren't his treating physician, but I need a voice of reason in this that isn't my boyfriend's. He was diagnosed with OCD about a year and a half ago while in rehab (he is 37). I guess growing up he has always had symptoms, but no one ever really did anything about it. He's had germ phobias, which have gotten better. He still obsesses about little things, like he has to carry a pen in his pocket, he has to have paper towels or hand cleanser. He doesn't do repetitive things like turning lights on and off so many times. His issues are mainly focused around religion. He has ritual prayers he says to keep bad thoughts away. Thoughts that he fears will ruin his images of me and his family. He grew up in a very religious family and I think his mother has issues of her own that have not been identified. He is very concerned with the state of his soul and feels like a complete failure. He has had 3 DUIs and his last was last year. They took away his license, he's been unemployed and he relies on his parents for everything at the moment. Which causes more stress for him. He just finished a nursing course last week and passed with flying colors. He told his mother he got a 91% and he told me that he thinks she was disappointed that he hadn't failed. She is a control freak and thinks that if it isn't done her way, then it isn't right. So here he is all elated about passing and achieving something and she comes along and chops him off at the knees and once again he's 3 inches tall. So yesterday he started drinking. He's scared that he will fail at any job he does, he's afraid that he won't be able to take care of me, etc. So he starts drinking. He only drinks when he is very stressed. When he does drink, it's a binge of a day or so. Then once again he's regretful. He knows he has a drinking problem .. He has 2 therapists, goes to recovery and church, is currently taking meds for OCD (Luvox), and antabuse. He apparently stopped taking the Antabuse 4 days ago, thinking that if he did, he could start drinking. I have spoken to his parents about his drinking and I don't really think they understand that the OCD is a major factor. They act like he is just a sinner that loves to drink and refuses to stop. They don't go to any meetings. They don't go to his therapy sessions. One of the first things his mother said to me was "I didn't think Christians could be alcoholics". That about floored me. They don't realize that this is an issue he has had for years and he started self medicating. I want to slap these people!
I guess I'm just looking for hope. I've read so much on the internet about wives/girlfriends that just can't take it anymore. That it keeps happening over and over again. I don't want to be that woman. But I also love him and want to see him succeed. He has wasted far too much time being drunk.
Since he was diagnosed with OCD, he has only been on Prozac and Luvox. Neither has worked. I've managed to convince him that he needs to try something else and keep trying until they find the right medication. They are supposed to start him on Anafril this week. I'm hoping that helps. He also has problems sleeping which contribute to his stress and anxiety. He is so worried about his actions in the past that he can't focus on the future. He has dabbled in drugs, but no longer does that. Between the stress of functioning daily and the guilt he carries, it's a wonder he has room to breathe.
Since I am in another state, it is difficult to help him. I do as much as I can. I will be visiting him next week. I'm doing my best not to enable him nor do I want to alienate him. In my personal opinion, I really feel that the key is in the OCD. I just feel that if he can get that regulated and controlled somewhat, it will be easier to deal with the drinking aspect and the stress of daily life. Am I wrong in thinking that? I don't want to have hope where there is none and I don't want to give up where there is.
Thank you for answering my email. I realize you are probably very busy and I don't want to impose on your kindness or generosity. Please know that your last email did help. For that I thank you.
Answer:
Hi, I can fully understand what you are going through. Not only does the addict suffer, but so does those around him/her. OCD is an anxiety disorder that will never go away. It caused me to need to drink heavy just to sedate myself from the anxiety. There were a lot of different reasons why I drank and there are several different reasons why your boyfriend continues to drink. It is very important to get to know the individual addict/mental health sufferer because everybody is diverse and has different circumstances that can trigger addiction. The proper medication will help your boyfriend to greatly diminish the effects of OCD. Again, everyones mental illness is different in symptoms and severity so it is always more helpful if I knew about his symptoms and "rituals". OCD is a real disorder that is caused by 4 main reasons. Unfortunately by knowing what could have cause his OCD will not help to cure it in any way. But by knowing environmental causes there are for OCD can help those in danger of getting it to take some preventive measures. Most OCD is genetic and there are no preventive measures for that. The right medication will make the severity of the symptoms diminish by as much as 70 or 80 percent. Your boyfriend needs to know himself very well to be able to understand the things that may make his OCD symptoms worsen. Stress is the biggest factor. By reducing stress OCD can often times be controlled without medication, but proper diet is also essential in helping to control OCD severity. He very well may drink because of the OCD but like I have said, there very well may be outside factors that increase his stress and anxiety which in turn make his symptoms more severe and in turn, this can very well be a strong factor in his drinking. There is no quick yes or no answer to your question. I don't mind if you have any follow up questions, i would be happy to help assist you in understanding your boyfriends situation, which is a situation that also impacts your life and stability. Sincerely, John Carcerano
P.S.
Reading your email again there are a few more points that come to mind. Something has caused him to stray from his therapy and treatment regimen. Stability of ones home life and schedule is a very important factor in controlling OCD. His going off of antibuse does show a premeditation that seems to be triggered by something either environmentally that is going on his life, or it could just be that his medication has not had time to work, or that it is the wrong medication and that alone can cause increased anxiety for him. Medication for psychological disorders take at least 1 or 2 months before they are effectively in the bloodstream and begin working. If one medication proves not to work so well, the body must be drained of that medication before going on a different one. That draining takes about a month also. So it is a trial and error period while looking for the right medication. His is a very complex situation. You, being his girlfriend and being out of state can add stress, loneliness, and by you not being there maybe he seems more stable in your company. Maybe you can influence a better control on him when you are there. This is all speculation as I do not know a lot of answers to why, that would take a full evaluation. I am self taught and not licensed, I wanted to make that clear to you. I have read over 450 noted books during the last 15 years dealing specifically with alcohol and drug addiction, psychological disorders and family counseling. Since I too am a sufferer of OCD, that has been another field of my expertise. I can assure you that the advice I give you can be taken with very good authority. Many of the books I have studied, I have read over 10 or 20 times each, just to get a true grasp of the concepts and facts they offered. I am happy to have shared some insight into your situation. My work is my passion. His parents you say are very religious. They too could be OCD. Strict religious practices and adhering to rigid morals are a most common factor and symptom of OCD. If his mom is having rituals she may very well be in denial or hiding them herself. It is a very real possibility, but again I cannot confirm this for sure as I am only able to do so much over the net. His sleepless nights can be a combination of worrying, diet and also he would be very restless and rigid when he comes down from the alcohol. Alcohol is widely thought to be a downer and a suppressant. But that is not the full story. When a person comes off heavy drinking it makes them agity and restless. There are chemicals in the alcohol, poisons that make the body like this. Now a person with OCD also has what's called 'Intensity of thought". This is where their mind is always working overtime.His mind is the way your mind would be if you were worried that say, you left your brand new bike in your backyard where everyone can see it and possibly steal it, but you wont get to your backyard because you are right now on a plane without a phone and you cannot call anyone you know to bring your bike in their house for safety. That anxiuosness you feel is what an OCD person feels most of the time. It never stops. Through stress reduction, diet, no caffeine, no alcohol, proper medication and learning behavoir therapy, the OCD sufferer can make their body almost whole again, or up to 80% whole again. A person without OCD has periods to where they can just relax and absorb into a movie and forget their day. A person with OCD is watching that movie, but thinking and seeing germs around them, they have all these different thoughts to contend with reguarding rituals to keep people safe and they are just plain obsessing and worrying like a rapid fire maching gun. It is learning to control these thoughts, that's what the OCD sufferer must do. Once these thoughts are ignored and not acted on, they will begin to rapidly subside. When his OCD mind gets him all agitated and tells him he must clean this germ or move that object, he must learn to ignore that thought and not act on it. Of course when he first begins not acting on his OCD thoughts, his anxiety levels will skyrocket. But after weeks and months of not acting on these thoughts, the OCD thinking eventually massively subsides in severity. Now when your boyfriend is stressed, from work or just worrying because he feels he has not made any money (when he makes no money he feels he cannot provide properly for you and he worries more). If he is coming off of drinking a few days prior, maybe he was drinking a lot of coffee and caffeine in his soda pop. So now he is agitated and his OCD is really acting up. Do you see how his condition can snowball now? There are many things that are influencing his problems. When he can learn to get in "harmony" with life, his situation, his diet, learning how to cut out his stress, getting the right medication, then he will begin to control his OCD and lead a much better life. Complex indeed. but not at all impossible. My OCD has mostly the rituals of having to do thing to prevent bad things from happening. But I have learned to cut down massively my stress, and I am mostly ignoring what these thoughts are telling me to do. Rituals I perform, but not as often and I have learned to do them in my mind, so no one notices. I can leave things dirty and not freak out that the microbes are gonna end the world. I am just careful not to drink out of anyone glass, or male sure they do not drink out of mine. And I only kiss a girl if she is my girlfriend, strangers I never kiss on the lips. I have an over active mind, but it helps me resolve issues, and I credit my OCD with helping me to structure thoughts into sentences and retain information. It makes me a good writer. LOL, There are a lot of pluses with having OCD. It is not all negative. So OCD can in many ways also be a blessing. JOHN P.S. I did not re-read this letter to you, so if a word is misspelled or a sentance not quite right, so be it.Sincerely, John Carcerano
For OCD sufferers I recommend the following books: "Brainlock" , and also, "The boy who couldn't stop washing." ALSO CLICK HERE for more on OCD from me, John Carcerano anj
My bf has a problem with drinking and OCD, can you help me?
Hi John,
Thank you for responding. I'll give you a bit of background. I realize you aren't his treating physician, but I need a voice of reason in this that isn't my boyfriend's. He was diagnosed with OCD about a year and a half ago while in rehab (he is 37). I guess growing up he has always had symptoms, but no one ever really did anything about it. He's had germ phobias, which have gotten better. He still obsesses about little things, like he has to carry a pen in his pocket, he has to have paper towels or hand cleanser. He doesn't do repetitive things like turning lights on and off so many times. His issues are mainly focused around religion. He has ritual prayers he says to keep bad thoughts away. Thoughts that he fears will ruin his images of me and his family. He grew up in a very religious family and I think his mother has issues of her own that have not been identified. He is very concerned with the state of his soul and feels like a complete failure. He has had 3 DUIs and his last was last year. They took away his license, he's been unemployed and he relies on his parents for everything at the moment. Which causes more stress for him. He just finished a nursing course last week and passed with flying colors. He told his mother he got a 91% and he told me that he thinks she was disappointed that he hadn't failed. She is a control freak and thinks that if it isn't done her way, then it isn't right. So here he is all elated about passing and achieving something and she comes along and chops him off at the knees and once again he's 3 inches tall. So yesterday he started drinking. He's scared that he will fail at any job he does, he's afraid that he won't be able to take care of me, etc. So he starts drinking. He only drinks when he is very stressed. When he does drink, it's a binge of a day or so. Then once again he's regretful. He knows he has a drinking problem .. He has 2 therapists, goes to recovery and church, is currently taking meds for OCD (Luvox), and antabuse. He apparently stopped taking the Antabuse 4 days ago, thinking that if he did, he could start drinking. I have spoken to his parents about his drinking and I don't really think they understand that the OCD is a major factor. They act like he is just a sinner that loves to drink and refuses to stop. They don't go to any meetings. They don't go to his therapy sessions. One of the first things his mother said to me was "I didn't think Christians could be alcoholics". That about floored me. They don't realize that this is an issue he has had for years and he started self medicating. I want to slap these people!
I guess I'm just looking for hope. I've read so much on the internet about wives/girlfriends that just can't take it anymore. That it keeps happening over and over again. I don't want to be that woman. But I also love him and want to see him succeed. He has wasted far too much time being drunk.
Since he was diagnosed with OCD, he has only been on Prozac and Luvox. Neither has worked. I've managed to convince him that he needs to try something else and keep trying until they find the right medication. They are supposed to start him on Anafril this week. I'm hoping that helps. He also has problems sleeping which contribute to his stress and anxiety. He is so worried about his actions in the past that he can't focus on the future. He has dabbled in drugs, but no longer does that. Between the stress of functioning daily and the guilt he carries, it's a wonder he has room to breathe.
Since I am in another state, it is difficult to help him. I do as much as I can. I will be visiting him next week. I'm doing my best not to enable him nor do I want to alienate him. In my personal opinion, I really feel that the key is in the OCD. I just feel that if he can get that regulated and controlled somewhat, it will be easier to deal with the drinking aspect and the stress of daily life. Am I wrong in thinking that? I don't want to have hope where there is none and I don't want to give up where there is.
Thank you for answering my email. I realize you are probably very busy and I don't want to impose on your kindness or generosity. Please know that your last email did help. For that I thank you.
Answer:
Hi, I can fully understand what you are going through. Not only does the addict suffer, but so does those around him/her. OCD is an anxiety disorder that will never go away. It caused me to need to drink heavy just to sedate myself from the anxiety. There were a lot of different reasons why I drank and there are several different reasons why your boyfriend continues to drink. It is very important to get to know the individual addict/mental health sufferer because everybody is diverse and has different circumstances that can trigger addiction. The proper medication will help your boyfriend to greatly diminish the effects of OCD. Again, everyones mental illness is different in symptoms and severity so it is always more helpful if I knew about his symptoms and "rituals". OCD is a real disorder that is caused by 4 main reasons. Unfortunately by knowing what could have cause his OCD will not help to cure it in any way. But by knowing environmental causes there are for OCD can help those in danger of getting it to take some preventive measures. Most OCD is genetic and there are no preventive measures for that. The right medication will make the severity of the symptoms diminish by as much as 70 or 80 percent. Your boyfriend needs to know himself very well to be able to understand the things that may make his OCD symptoms worsen. Stress is the biggest factor. By reducing stress OCD can often times be controlled without medication, but proper diet is also essential in helping to control OCD severity. He very well may drink because of the OCD but like I have said, there very well may be outside factors that increase his stress and anxiety which in turn make his symptoms more severe and in turn, this can very well be a strong factor in his drinking. There is no quick yes or no answer to your question. I don't mind if you have any follow up questions, i would be happy to help assist you in understanding your boyfriends situation, which is a situation that also impacts your life and stability. Sincerely, John Carcerano
P.S.
Reading your email again there are a few more points that come to mind. Something has caused him to stray from his therapy and treatment regimen. Stability of ones home life and schedule is a very important factor in controlling OCD. His going off of antibuse does show a premeditation that seems to be triggered by something either environmentally that is going on his life, or it could just be that his medication has not had time to work, or that it is the wrong medication and that alone can cause increased anxiety for him. Medication for psychological disorders take at least 1 or 2 months before they are effectively in the bloodstream and begin working. If one medication proves not to work so well, the body must be drained of that medication before going on a different one. That draining takes about a month also. So it is a trial and error period while looking for the right medication. His is a very complex situation. You, being his girlfriend and being out of state can add stress, loneliness, and by you not being there maybe he seems more stable in your company. Maybe you can influence a better control on him when you are there. This is all speculation as I do not know a lot of answers to why, that would take a full evaluation. I am self taught and not licensed, I wanted to make that clear to you. I have read over 450 noted books during the last 15 years dealing specifically with alcohol and drug addiction, psychological disorders and family counseling. Since I too am a sufferer of OCD, that has been another field of my expertise. I can assure you that the advice I give you can be taken with very good authority. Many of the books I have studied, I have read over 10 or 20 times each, just to get a true grasp of the concepts and facts they offered. I am happy to have shared some insight into your situation. My work is my passion. His parents you say are very religious. They too could be OCD. Strict religious practices and adhering to rigid morals are a most common factor and symptom of OCD. If his mom is having rituals she may very well be in denial or hiding them herself. It is a very real possibility, but again I cannot confirm this for sure as I am only able to do so much over the net. His sleepless nights can be a combination of worrying, diet and also he would be very restless and rigid when he comes down from the alcohol. Alcohol is widely thought to be a downer and a suppressant. But that is not the full story. When a person comes off heavy drinking it makes them agity and restless. There are chemicals in the alcohol, poisons that make the body like this. Now a person with OCD also has what's called 'Intensity of thought". This is where their mind is always working overtime.His mind is the way your mind would be if you were worried that say, you left your brand new bike in your backyard where everyone can see it and possibly steal it, but you wont get to your backyard because you are right now on a plane without a phone and you cannot call anyone you know to bring your bike in their house for safety. That anxiuosness you feel is what an OCD person feels most of the time. It never stops. Through stress reduction, diet, no caffeine, no alcohol, proper medication and learning behavoir therapy, the OCD sufferer can make their body almost whole again, or up to 80% whole again. A person without OCD has periods to where they can just relax and absorb into a movie and forget their day. A person with OCD is watching that movie, but thinking and seeing germs around them, they have all these different thoughts to contend with reguarding rituals to keep people safe and they are just plain obsessing and worrying like a rapid fire maching gun. It is learning to control these thoughts, that's what the OCD sufferer must do. Once these thoughts are ignored and not acted on, they will begin to rapidly subside. When his OCD mind gets him all agitated and tells him he must clean this germ or move that object, he must learn to ignore that thought and not act on it. Of course when he first begins not acting on his OCD thoughts, his anxiety levels will skyrocket. But after weeks and months of not acting on these thoughts, the OCD thinking eventually massively subsides in severity. Now when your boyfriend is stressed, from work or just worrying because he feels he has not made any money (when he makes no money he feels he cannot provide properly for you and he worries more). If he is coming off of drinking a few days prior, maybe he was drinking a lot of coffee and caffeine in his soda pop. So now he is agitated and his OCD is really acting up. Do you see how his condition can snowball now? There are many things that are influencing his problems. When he can learn to get in "harmony" with life, his situation, his diet, learning how to cut out his stress, getting the right medication, then he will begin to control his OCD and lead a much better life. Complex indeed. but not at all impossible. My OCD has mostly the rituals of having to do thing to prevent bad things from happening. But I have learned to cut down massively my stress, and I am mostly ignoring what these thoughts are telling me to do. Rituals I perform, but not as often and I have learned to do them in my mind, so no one notices. I can leave things dirty and not freak out that the microbes are gonna end the world. I am just careful not to drink out of anyone glass, or male sure they do not drink out of mine. And I only kiss a girl if she is my girlfriend, strangers I never kiss on the lips. I have an over active mind, but it helps me resolve issues, and I credit my OCD with helping me to structure thoughts into sentences and retain information. It makes me a good writer. LOL, There are a lot of pluses with having OCD. It is not all negative. So OCD can in many ways also be a blessing. JOHN P.S. I did not re-read this letter to you, so if a word is misspelled or a sentance not quite right, so be it.Sincerely, John Carcerano
For OCD sufferers I recommend the following books: "Brainlock" , and also, "The boy who couldn't stop washing." ALSO CLICK HERE for more on OCD from me, John Carcerano anj
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Families often ignore the Elephant in the living room, here's why
"Elephant in the living room" as defined by wikipedia:
The elephant in the room (also elephant in the living room, elephant in the parlor, elephant in the corner, elephant on the dinner table, elephant in the kitchen, elephant on the coffee table, and horse in the corner) is an English idiom for an obvious truth that is being ignored or goes unaddressed. It is based on the idea that an elephant in a room would be impossible to overlook; thus, people in the room who pretend the elephant is not there might be concerning themselves with relatively small and even irrelevant matters, compared to the looming big one. ......
The following is by John Carcerano "A New Journey"
When crises or hard to handle matters strike and effect families they often choose to silently acknowledge them, but also ignore them. This is known as "The family silent secret".
When a family is faced with the addiction of a mom or dad, brother or sister it is usually acknowledged in secrecy. This is usually the case when they are unable to treat or "cure" the problem. So quiet acknowledgment is a way of blocking and defending the issue from the outside world. Mental illness carries with it a raw, cold hard stigma which should not exist in the first place. People seem to think that mental illness is a rare and hardly ever seen disorder. People are shunned when it is found out they are a sufferer. But why? 1 in 5 have a mental illness and 1 in 3 have an addiction and nearly every family and everyone is affected by the addict. So why all the secrecy from family members? Good question. Families would find they are much better off to address this "elephant in their living room". But a few good reasons why it is not addressed is because families do not know how to properly address them and also the family member in question may rebel and leave or completely abandon the house hold if too much pressure is put on them to "change" or "get treated". So the family chooses to be in denial about the situation or just enables it for the safety and shelter of the loved one involved.
The problem with addiction is that families and most people in general do not know how to treat problems such as alcohol and drug addiction or mental illness because they are such complex illnesses.
Complex situations that cannot be handled or dealt with are then swept under the rug. "A New Journey" Is here to help you learn to properly deal with these situations that most plague the family. The family must first look through the stigma because mental illness and addiction are very common illnesses. The problem is that most people themselves do not properly recognize or admit to having an addiction or an illness, thus this ignorance and misunderstanding causes and feeds this unnecessary and unwarranted stigma. remember to deal with things head on and with dignity.
If your family has an elephant in it's living room there is plenty you can do about it other than taking the easy way out and ignoring it. Stop the continued damage it causes and take action, contact a counselor or mental health professional and "talk about and discuss" your families issues so that it won't destroy the health of those around the suffering loved one.
You can get free counseling and support by contacting your states social service agency and get the help, education and guidance you need to make the situation right. This blog along with the e-zines I am writing are all designed to help you help yourself or your loved one to end the suffering and trauma associated with addiction and mental illness. Click here for links to all 50 states social service agencies.
More links on dealing with denial
Dealing and understanding how denial stops progress
Sunday, March 29, 2009
So you're tired, lost, upset, anguished, confused and addicted. What do you do next?
by John Carcerano
The first thing you do is call someone else who has recovered from alcoholism or drug addiction themselves. The plan of action they may have or the philosophy on life they hold may not be the same as yours but right now that does not matter. What they can offer you is solitude, guidance and refuge from using again. They are someone who has been there and suffered just like you have, but they have gotten well and they support you in that he/she wants the same for you. You cannot go near the people you hang with or the places you always hangout at. That is an instant environment for you to continue using. If there is no one you know that has achieved recovery with whom you can go visit then look up your nearest AA general service office. They are staffed 24 hours a day 7 days a week by a caring and understanding ex addict who will immediately contact someone from your local area to come pick you up and get to a meeting. If you dread the thought of a "meeting" or are not religious and do not want to participate in a "gospel hour" then don't worry, because there are no gospel hours held at AA/NA closed meetings. They are made up of men and women from all walks of life who have suffered just like you are suffering now. They won't judge you or say under their breath when walk in "oh God, here comes another loser"If you think they will then you are sadly mistaken. You must open your mind and let these wonderful people into your world, because they will show you their world of sobriety and a better calm. I was very lost and depressed, as my world came crashing down on me one day and I knew that I just had to quit drinking hard alcohol everyday around the clock. I was scared to go to that meeting but I was also destroyed and felt hopeless inside and knew no other way to turn my hell around. I jumped into that first meeting head first. When it was my turn to talk I just rocked back in my chair and gazed out not really looking anyone in the eyes and just spilled my trouble. I said it like it was. "I was in financial trouble and drinking everyday, morning noon and night, 2 to 4 half pints of hard liquor a day and living in a world where I felt depressed and hopeless. I just had to quit cause it is destroying me". I went numb as i spoke and really did not know what anyone could do for me just because I was spilling my pathetic guts of what a loser I felt I was. Well when that meeting ended, a school friend of mine whom I did not even know was there had handed me a list that was passed around the room which had the names and phone numbers of about 30 people on it. That list and the support it had brought me at my most vulnerable time became a life saver for me. I called those numbers every night for the first few weeks of recovery. If I had not had those numbers I would have gone out and got booze. I have had periods before, during and after I found recovery where times would get very trying, stressful and uncertain, and it was at these times I found the solace of others with my same addiction and recovery issues was a very welcome sight to calm my fluttering and anxiety ridden mind. Even if you are not very religious it also helps to stop into a church for the aura, love and kindness that can be found there. But when you feel your world is crashing in and you need to end your addiction, it;s important to surround yourself only with those who are in recovery from addiction, or stay home alone and talk on the phone with these people until the need to use or drink has subsided, until you tire and feel the need to go sleep. Remember that you can't use drugs or alcohol while you are sleeping and the thing to know is that you must just get through your day until night comes, then sleep time is safe time. If you are having trouble falling asleep then cut out all caffeine from your daily diet and try a gentle over the counter sedative if you must. But be very careful you do not become addicted to pills in order to sleep at night. When you are newly into your recovery the body can be very disrupted for at least the first several so agitation and sleeplessness will probably be an early issue for you. But once you are through the first few weeks of relieving your body from the constant onslaught of toxic chemicals, then as your body is readjusting, it will naturally become more serene and calmer. There are more issues to look out for as you eliminate the effects of drugs and alcohol on your mind and body. You will need to see if there are any underlying issues such as anxiety or depression that may have been one of the root causes to your vulnerability to become addicted in the first place. I don't want to confuse you here, so just take things one step at a time. The first year of your recovery will be one in which you get to re know yourself much better than you may have ever realized before. This is good. "A New Journey" hopes to be able to help guide you as you navigate from your world of addiction, into a new and wonderful world of sobriety and serenity. And it is indeed a wonderful thing, recovery.
:Remember this: When you need help quitting an addiction just reach out to someone in the addiction recovery field or an ex addict, you will be surprised at the help that is out there for you.
The first thing you do is call someone else who has recovered from alcoholism or drug addiction themselves. The plan of action they may have or the philosophy on life they hold may not be the same as yours but right now that does not matter. What they can offer you is solitude, guidance and refuge from using again. They are someone who has been there and suffered just like you have, but they have gotten well and they support you in that he/she wants the same for you. You cannot go near the people you hang with or the places you always hangout at. That is an instant environment for you to continue using. If there is no one you know that has achieved recovery with whom you can go visit then look up your nearest AA general service office. They are staffed 24 hours a day 7 days a week by a caring and understanding ex addict who will immediately contact someone from your local area to come pick you up and get to a meeting. If you dread the thought of a "meeting" or are not religious and do not want to participate in a "gospel hour" then don't worry, because there are no gospel hours held at AA/NA closed meetings. They are made up of men and women from all walks of life who have suffered just like you are suffering now. They won't judge you or say under their breath when walk in "oh God, here comes another loser"If you think they will then you are sadly mistaken. You must open your mind and let these wonderful people into your world, because they will show you their world of sobriety and a better calm. I was very lost and depressed, as my world came crashing down on me one day and I knew that I just had to quit drinking hard alcohol everyday around the clock. I was scared to go to that meeting but I was also destroyed and felt hopeless inside and knew no other way to turn my hell around. I jumped into that first meeting head first. When it was my turn to talk I just rocked back in my chair and gazed out not really looking anyone in the eyes and just spilled my trouble. I said it like it was. "I was in financial trouble and drinking everyday, morning noon and night, 2 to 4 half pints of hard liquor a day and living in a world where I felt depressed and hopeless. I just had to quit cause it is destroying me". I went numb as i spoke and really did not know what anyone could do for me just because I was spilling my pathetic guts of what a loser I felt I was. Well when that meeting ended, a school friend of mine whom I did not even know was there had handed me a list that was passed around the room which had the names and phone numbers of about 30 people on it. That list and the support it had brought me at my most vulnerable time became a life saver for me. I called those numbers every night for the first few weeks of recovery. If I had not had those numbers I would have gone out and got booze. I have had periods before, during and after I found recovery where times would get very trying, stressful and uncertain, and it was at these times I found the solace of others with my same addiction and recovery issues was a very welcome sight to calm my fluttering and anxiety ridden mind. Even if you are not very religious it also helps to stop into a church for the aura, love and kindness that can be found there. But when you feel your world is crashing in and you need to end your addiction, it;s important to surround yourself only with those who are in recovery from addiction, or stay home alone and talk on the phone with these people until the need to use or drink has subsided, until you tire and feel the need to go sleep. Remember that you can't use drugs or alcohol while you are sleeping and the thing to know is that you must just get through your day until night comes, then sleep time is safe time. If you are having trouble falling asleep then cut out all caffeine from your daily diet and try a gentle over the counter sedative if you must. But be very careful you do not become addicted to pills in order to sleep at night. When you are newly into your recovery the body can be very disrupted for at least the first several so agitation and sleeplessness will probably be an early issue for you. But once you are through the first few weeks of relieving your body from the constant onslaught of toxic chemicals, then as your body is readjusting, it will naturally become more serene and calmer. There are more issues to look out for as you eliminate the effects of drugs and alcohol on your mind and body. You will need to see if there are any underlying issues such as anxiety or depression that may have been one of the root causes to your vulnerability to become addicted in the first place. I don't want to confuse you here, so just take things one step at a time. The first year of your recovery will be one in which you get to re know yourself much better than you may have ever realized before. This is good. "A New Journey" hopes to be able to help guide you as you navigate from your world of addiction, into a new and wonderful world of sobriety and serenity. And it is indeed a wonderful thing, recovery.
:Remember this: When you need help quitting an addiction just reach out to someone in the addiction recovery field or an ex addict, you will be surprised at the help that is out there for you.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
amazing grace...even the most hopeless can , will and do get better
Amazing Grace Lyrics
"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.
T'was Grace that taught...
my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear...
the hour I first believed.
Through many dangers, toils and snares...
we have already come.
T'was Grace that brought us safe thus far...
and Grace will lead us home.
The Lord has promised good to me...
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be...
as long as life endures.
When we've been here ten thousand years...
bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise...
then when we've first begun.
"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me....
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now, I see.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
"People with mental illness enrich our lives"
"People with Mental Illness Enrich Our Lives"
Information about famous people throughout history who have had a serious mental illness.
Abraham Lincoln
The revered sixteenth President of the United States suffered from severe and incapacitating depressions that occasionally led to thoughts of suicide, as documented in numerous biographies by Carl Sandburg.
Virginia Woolf
The British novelist who wrote To the Lighthouse and Orlando experienced the mood swings of bipolar disorder characterized by feverish periods of writing and weeks immersed in gloom. Her story is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.
Lionel Aldridge
A defensive end for Vince Lombardi's legendary Green Bay Packers of the 1960's, Aldridge played in two Super Bowls. In the 1970's, he suffered from schizophrenia and was homeless for two and a half years. Until his death in 1998, he gave inspirational talks on his battle against paranoid schizophrenia. His story is the story of numerous newspaper articles.
Eugene O'Neill
The famous playwright, author of Long Day's Journey Into Night and Ah, Wilderness!, suffered from clinical depression, as documented in Eugene O'Neill by Olivia E. Coolidge.
Ludwig van Beethoven
The brilliant composer experienced bipolar disorder, as documented in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.
Gaetano Donizetti
The famous opera singer suffered from bipolar disorder, as documented in Donizetti and the World Opera in Italy, Paris and Vienna in the First Half of the Nineteenth Century by Herbert Weinstock.
Robert Schumann
The "inspired poet of human suffering" experienced bipolar disorder, as discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.
Leo Tolstoy
Author of War and Peace, Tolstoy revealed the extent of his own mental illness in the memoir Confession. His experiences is also discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Inner World of Mental Illness: A Series of First Person Accounts of What It Was Like by Bert Kaplan.
Vaslov Nijinsky
The dancer's battle with schizophrenia is documented in his autobiography, The Diary of Vaslov Nijinksy.
John Keats
The renowned poet's mental illness is documented in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Broken Brain: The biological Revolution in Psychiatry by Nancy Andreasen, M.D.
Tennessee Williams
The playwright gave a personal account of his struggle with clinical depression in his own Memoirs. His experience is also documented in Five O'Clock Angel: Letters of Tennessee Williams to Maria St. Just, 1948-1982; The Kindness of Strangers: The Life of Tennessee Williams by Donald Spoto, and Tennessee: Cry of the Heart by Dotson.
Vincent Van Gogh
The celebrated artist's bipolar disorder is discussed in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb and Dear Theo, The Autobiography of Van Gogh.
Isaac Newton
The scientist's mental illness is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.
Ernest Hemingway
The Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist's suicidal depression is examined in the True Gen: An Intimate Portrait of Ernest Hemingway by Those Who Knew Him by Denis Brian.
Sylvia Plath
The poet and novelist ended her lifelong struggle with clinical depresion by taking own life, as reported in A Closer Look at Ariel: A Memory of Sylvia Plath by nancy Hunter-Steiner.
Michelangelo
The mental illness of one of the world's greatest artistic geniuses is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.
Winston Churchill
"Had he been a stable and equable man, he could never have inspired the nation. In 1940, when all the odds were against Britain, a leader of sober judgment might well have concluded that we were finished," wrote Anthony Storr about Churchill's bipolar disorder in Churchill's Black Dog, Kafka's Mice, and Other Phenomena of the Human Mind.
Vivien Leigh
The Gone with the Wind star suffered from mental illness, as documented in Vivien Leigh: A Biography by Ann Edwards.
Jimmy Piersall
The baseball player for the Boston Red Sox who suffered from bipolar disorder detailed his experience in The Truth Hurts.
Patty Duke
The Academy Award-winning actress told of her bipolar disorder in her autobiography and made-for-TV move Call Me Anna and A Brilliant Madness: Living with Manic-Depressive Illness, co-authored by Gloria Hochman.
Charles Dickens
One of the greatest authors in the English language suffered from clinical depression, as documented in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by D. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb, and Charles Dickens: His Tragedy and Triumph by Edgar Johnson.
The 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous...and know this.......
about why AA works. Just the fact that you stay away from the people, places and hangouts where you used to use, and groups like AA give you a place to go where you can form a bond with others who share your struggles and experiences....Here are the 12 steps;
Alcoholics Anonymous - Page 58
CHAPTER 5 HOW IT WORKS
RARELY HAVE we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average. There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.
Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now. If you have decided that you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it - then you are ready to take certain steps.
At some of these we balked. We thought that we could find an easier, softer way. But we could not. With all earnestness at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from the very start. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely.
Remember that we deal with alcohol - cunning, baffling, powerful! Without help it is too much for us. But there is One who has all power - that One is God. May you find him now.
Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon.
Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery:
1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Many of us exclaimed, "What an order! I can't go through with it." Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we were willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.
Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter of the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:
(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought.
© From the Book - Alcoholics Anonymous
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
This can be..........
by John Carcerano
such a sad, tough and lonely world at times, why bring pain to one another cause it really does not have to be that way. LOOK, THINK and ACT differently as you travel on this road of life, and remember that sometimes you have to yield to others less fortunate or to those who are truly much weaker than you are. There are no road signs along the way through this road, so think carefully and sometimes thoughtfully as you journey on by, and remember that kindness and attention to others will make your journey more peaceful and calmer as we journey through this often hard world,..together. by john carcerano, for you.
such a sad, tough and lonely world at times, why bring pain to one another cause it really does not have to be that way. LOOK, THINK and ACT differently as you travel on this road of life, and remember that sometimes you have to yield to others less fortunate or to those who are truly much weaker than you are. There are no road signs along the way through this road, so think carefully and sometimes thoughtfully as you journey on by, and remember that kindness and attention to others will make your journey more peaceful and calmer as we journey through this often hard world,..together. by john carcerano, for you.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Your life is a series of spans, how these spans influence you and your addiction
by John CarceranoWhen you're 4 years old you look at a 20 year old as real real old. But in reality there is only a 16 year difference in the two. The way a 50 year old looks at the time span of 16 years is much different than the way a 4 year old looks at it. When you are alive for 4 years it seems like a long time because you do not remember what it felt like to be around before that, because you did not exist so you therefore could not feel. To a 4 year old 16 years is 4 times the years of their age. So that's a long time. to a 20 year old being 4 again is going back a long ways, but not as long as the perspective a 4 year old has about being 20. To a 50 year old, 16 years means only about one third of their age. The years from 2 on up to 9 just seem to go on forever, as do the years of 9 through to about 18. I think being forced to listen to authority telling you how to do things along with the drawn out years of having to go school (which never seem to end) make adolescence drag on slowly. In our lives major changes seem to happen every 5 to 7 years. Major changes such as sicknesses, deaths, marriages, divorces, tragedies, moving etc. If you look back at your life you will see that every five to seven years your life was massively different due to changes both within and beyond your control. At age 20 you feel strong, vigorous, youthful and you have a full head of dark rich colored hair. At 21 you start to know that your not a teenager anymore, and that reality sets in as each new birthday goes on. By 30, you still feel like your in your early 20's, but by 32 or 33 you start to fret 40 and reality sets in that you are no longer 20 nor will you ever be again. By 35 or 38, 40 seems like a time that will never or better never come. You look to it with dread. At 35 you notice a few gray hairs and you reject them by promptly pulling them out. Thus you tell yourself that your "not gray yet, how did those get here"? And you still feel very youthful. But as 39 creeps up you start to feel very much different inside. You think about being 10 years old again, the time when your mother and father were 40 years old themselves. Now you start to worry that you indeed are getting old. You know the years truly are passing but you now begin to fight it and look for meaning in it all. Your once youthful face now has a small line or two underneath your eyes. You finally do turn 40 and you finally start to feel that you are indeed getting older whether you like it or not. This stage of life is called 'The big reality stage". more to come on this analysis and how your addiction is influenced by these factors ...............
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
So your new to recovery and your therapist said you need meds......
By John Carcerano
Your new to recovery and after a proper assessment from your psychiatrist you are told you need medication. Don't rebel and refuse this evaluation but just make sure you can go see another doctor for another evaluation. If you are broke and cannot afford a psychiatrist do as I have always recommended before and contact your state department of human services and tell them your situation. Most, if not all states will be able to get you some state sponsored care for little or no money. But don't be ashamed to need medication for a psychological disorder. 1 in 5 need psychiatric medication for one condition or another. Just most don't recognize it or they are in denial about their condition or they just don't care and go without the medication they need. Your mind and your body is now free from the influences and mood swings that were associated with your past chemical use. It is only when you are free from those influences that you are able to be properly assessed by an experienced therapist/psychiatrist. The real you is now emerging and with that comes the understanding of why you were drawn to the relief drugs and alcohol had on your mind. Take the medication if you must. If you're afraid of the stigma associated with having to take psychiatric medicne then don't tell anyone that you are on medication. Don't concern yourself about what others think, concern yourself only with getting better and taking care of yourself. Just because you quit your vice does not mean that your problems are over. You need to address the "dry drunk/addict" in you. The person you were just before you began using is the one that for some reason was physically, psychologically and physiologically drawn to chemical addiction. Quitting your vice is the first major big step, that means you recognize that you want to change, now you have to get well, stay well and keep away from the influences that attracted you to addiction in the first place.
Your new to recovery and after a proper assessment from your psychiatrist you are told you need medication. Don't rebel and refuse this evaluation but just make sure you can go see another doctor for another evaluation. If you are broke and cannot afford a psychiatrist do as I have always recommended before and contact your state department of human services and tell them your situation. Most, if not all states will be able to get you some state sponsored care for little or no money. But don't be ashamed to need medication for a psychological disorder. 1 in 5 need psychiatric medication for one condition or another. Just most don't recognize it or they are in denial about their condition or they just don't care and go without the medication they need. Your mind and your body is now free from the influences and mood swings that were associated with your past chemical use. It is only when you are free from those influences that you are able to be properly assessed by an experienced therapist/psychiatrist. The real you is now emerging and with that comes the understanding of why you were drawn to the relief drugs and alcohol had on your mind. Take the medication if you must. If you're afraid of the stigma associated with having to take psychiatric medicne then don't tell anyone that you are on medication. Don't concern yourself about what others think, concern yourself only with getting better and taking care of yourself. Just because you quit your vice does not mean that your problems are over. You need to address the "dry drunk/addict" in you. The person you were just before you began using is the one that for some reason was physically, psychologically and physiologically drawn to chemical addiction. Quitting your vice is the first major big step, that means you recognize that you want to change, now you have to get well, stay well and keep away from the influences that attracted you to addiction in the first place.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Have another laugh courtesy of www.lifesajoke.com
LAUGH>>LAUGH>>LAUGH!
How many Irish does it take to change a light bulb?
Twenty One. One to hold the bulb and twenty to drink until the room spins.
This really drunk guy walks up to a parking meter and puts in a quarter. He stares at the needle that has stopped at 60 and exclaims, "I can't believe I lost 100 pounds!"
What's the difference between a bar and a g-spot?
Most men have no trouble finding a bar.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder...
Two blondes walk into the bar....You'd think one of them would of seen it!
What would you call a drunk who works at an upholstery shop?
A recovering alcoholic.
Two friends were out drinking when suddenly one lurched backward off his barstool and lay motionless on the floor. "One thing about Jim," his buddy said to the bartender, "He knows when to stop."
A baby seal walks into a bar and sits down. "What can I get you?" asked the bartender. "Anything but a Canadian Club" replied the seal.
A five-dollar bill walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Get outta here! We don't serve your type. This is a singles bar."
A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says: "Pint please, and one for the road."
There was a guy who had at least 4-5 drinks of whiskey every day of his adult life. When he died, they cremated him, and it took two days to put out the fire!
Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.
What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?
One less drunk.
Three old ladies are walking down the street. They are hard of hearing.
One: "Whew, it's windy today!"
Two: "No. Today's Thursday!"
Three: "So am I! Let's go to a bar!
courtesy of www.coolfunnyjokes.com
Laugh a little it helps!
Bar Joke
| Alcoholic Side Effects | |
| The FDA is considering additional warnings on beer and alcohol bottles, such as: WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not. WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an a-hole. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember). WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Chuck. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you. WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuem, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear". WARNING: consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy. |
Monday, February 23, 2009
Craig ferguson : straight from the heart..He is a funny man though, 15 years sober, listen to him tell you!
Monday, February 16, 2009
Thursday, February 5, 2009
The next time you throw garbage away on the street, think again. Read This..........
by John CareceranoThe next time you carelessly throw away a candy wrapper, cigarette butt, coffee cup or some type of garbage please think again and don't. Throw your garbage in the a refuse can. I used to be the biggest litterer around. I would throw junk and garbage on the street just out of my disdain for society, or just to show my hate for the local government. Well these people who have to pick up all the trash on the street are mostly re-habilitating ex-cons or recovering addicts just trying to get a new foothold on their lives. Tonia Dunbar whom I have chronicled in my blogs was briefly employed as a trash gatherer for the city of Chicago. She was 3 years into her recovery from crack addiction and this was her first real job. Unfortunately she was not ready for steady employment yet and the pressure from this job caused her to briefly re-lapse. It was this experience of hers that caused me to look differently at how and where I throw out my garbage. I just want to do all I can to help an addict and by throwing paper on the street I am making a recovering addicts life that much more tougher. It is really that I feel I am showing disrespect for a suffering and recovering addict if I would continue to throw my refuse on the ground. My aunt used to take my brother, sister and me out to eat several times a year and when we would go to a restaurant she would always leave a large tip for the waitress. This was back in the 1970's and she would always leave at least a 25% tip. She would always justify this by telling me that my mother used to be a waitress and that waitresses only make like $1.00 an hour. She told me how they depend on their tips for their income. I think the real reason my aunt would leave a large tip for waitresses was because it was somehow her way in showing respect for my mother whom at the time was lost on the streets and homeless due to her losing battle with alcoholism. I will chronicale more about my moms tragic story and the story of other addicts in my soon to be released book "A New Journey". But what is very apparent to me now is how alcoholism effects the very lives of those who are the family members of the addict. It's a daily suffering on the lives of everyone involved in an alcoholic or drug addicts life. Take my aunt for example. I can now remember how she used to always give money to street people. This was her way of trying to reconcile that she had lost a sister, my mother to addiction and the streets. My mother was too sick to play a steady part in our lives and my aunt tried very hard to make this up to us. She would give us $50.00 on our birthday and do the same for us on Christmas and several other times during the year. My aunt did not work, I only found out much later that my aunt was in debt deeply with her credit cards. Through this blog I hope to bring you my heart, my soul, my mind and my experiences with addiction in order to enlighten and help you and your loved ones if your life is effected by alcohol or drug addiction. In my books and writings I try to bring you full circle in your understanding of this most tragic subject, and show you how it doesn't have to be tragic at all. So through my blogs and my writings I feel what you feel and together lets get you the answers you have come for. A new life is not only possible, it will happen. That is my goal.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
QUESTION BY ANONYMOUS: I think I'm Depressed with Racing Thoughts and Low self Esteem
Anyone have some advice? I think I'm depressed..?
alright at first i was reluctant to do this because ive convinced myself that im perfectly fine and that its all in my head. but at this point, i honestly just dont know what to do. and id feel a little better if i got some one elses advice on this. answers are greatly appreciated so thanks in advance
welll. i have a feeling i might be depressed. its been going on for a couple years now. since i was like 14. now im 16. my eating and sleeping patterns are constantly changing. like last year, i wouldnt eat. this year, i eat a lott. and for sleeping - i either cant sleep at night or sleep too much. and im always tired. lately, i cant sleep or concentrate, especially in school, because my mind is constantly racing and the only way to block out the thoughts is listening to music.
i always feel alone, because i am. i never do anything except like go to school and sit in my room every day listening to music. i just dont have many friends. and my best friend hasnt talked to me in a few days [shes two years older than me] and i havent seen her in three weeks. and i absolutely hate it and it hurts a lot, not seeing her more often. i dont think she realizes how much she hurts me but i can never tell her because im younger, so i always feel bad. that im like interfering with her other friends. idk.
i have a low self confidence, i usually blame myself for things and when i do something wrong [like missing an important call because i was sleeping] i beat myself up for it. not literally, but i feel completely horrible inside about it.
and i just dont feel like theres a point in living anymore. because like its the same thing over and over, every day. its really boring and sad and i just dont like it at alll.
hmm what else..
well now that i have no one to talk to since my best friend hasnt been there.. i kinda just keep everything inside. and ive been considering talking to someone at school about it.. but like i said, i tell myself im fine and that theres nothing wrong with me so it would be stupid to talk to someone about it. and i can never get up the courage to talk anyway. like, ill decide to talk to a teacher about it, and then when i get to that class, i just cant do it. i feel like an idiot =/
theres a lot more but ill spare the rest of the details. sorry for ranting, i kinda just need to get things off my mind. if you read all of this, thanks a lot. so what do you think? do you think its depression or am i just thinking too much?
[oh and i cant tell my parents, so please, dont suggest that.]
welll. i have a feeling i might be depressed. its been going on for a couple years now. since i was like 14. now im 16. my eating and sleeping patterns are constantly changing. like last year, i wouldnt eat. this year, i eat a lott. and for sleeping - i either cant sleep at night or sleep too much. and im always tired. lately, i cant sleep or concentrate, especially in school, because my mind is constantly racing and the only way to block out the thoughts is listening to music.
i always feel alone, because i am. i never do anything except like go to school and sit in my room every day listening to music. i just dont have many friends. and my best friend hasnt talked to me in a few days [shes two years older than me] and i havent seen her in three weeks. and i absolutely hate it and it hurts a lot, not seeing her more often. i dont think she realizes how much she hurts me but i can never tell her because im younger, so i always feel bad. that im like interfering with her other friends. idk.
i have a low self confidence, i usually blame myself for things and when i do something wrong [like missing an important call because i was sleeping] i beat myself up for it. not literally, but i feel completely horrible inside about it.
and i just dont feel like theres a point in living anymore. because like its the same thing over and over, every day. its really boring and sad and i just dont like it at alll.
hmm what else..
well now that i have no one to talk to since my best friend hasnt been there.. i kinda just keep everything inside. and ive been considering talking to someone at school about it.. but like i said, i tell myself im fine and that theres nothing wrong with me so it would be stupid to talk to someone about it. and i can never get up the courage to talk anyway. like, ill decide to talk to a teacher about it, and then when i get to that class, i just cant do it. i feel like an idiot =/
theres a lot more but ill spare the rest of the details. sorry for ranting, i kinda just need to get things off my mind. if you read all of this, thanks a lot. so what do you think? do you think its depression or am i just thinking too much?
[oh and i cant tell my parents, so please, dont suggest that.]
Additional Details
well i dont know how to explain the thoughts really. i just keep thinking about things. like how bad i feel usually. and they wont go away. and when i try to sleep, i feel like my mind is working overtime instead of shutting down and letting me relax.
and i tend to overanalyze every situation too. like the best friend thing, when she says she'll text me, and she doesnt for a few days, i cant help but feel horrible, either like i did something wrong, or that she doesnt like me as much as she says she does. i doubt things like that all the time.
i think its because i feel so bad about myself, i just dont see how anyone would want to be friends with me.
Answered by John Carcerano
There is depression that's for sure.Self esteem issues added to this only amplify your woes. Now, the racing thoughts are another sign in and of itself.The kind of racing thoughts determines a lot about your diagnosis. Are your thoughts rambling and changing constantly or are they intense and logical. How often your thoughts race are important to know. You may just have intensity of thoughts and not racing thoughts. But I do suspect they are racing by the way you described them.Racing thoughts and depression could be a sign of Bipolar. It starts in the teens and young adulthood.You need a full and proper assessment by a good shrink.It's great you are reaching out and asking for help. You don't seem to be in denial about what you do and how you affect people around you. It would also be helpful if you can force yourself to get out on a regular basis even if it's just a ceramics class, the library or to a church gathering. Please keep away from drugs and alcohol because you are highly susceptible to addiction for relief from your racing mind and lower self esteem and depression. Your state can get you to a shrink for free or for just a few dollars out of your pocket. Contact your states social and human service dept.
www.anewjourney.com
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Deciphering the dreams of an alcohol/drug counselor
by John Carcerano www.anewjourney.com
Last week when I went to sleep I seemed to sleep very well. But I had this dream that seemed to go on forever. I'm John Carcerano, the founder of "A New Journey" and an addiction counselor. I get so tied up with the people who I work with that sometimes I get bothered at the most intrusive hours. I can't turn down any addicts who are reaching out to me for help. My tired body may want to at times, but my mind and my heart won't allow it. Dreams do tell you everything you need to know about yourself, they really do. I had this dream last week that seemed to go on all night. It was a long lasting one . I collect antique furniture and I was visiting this elderly lady who was showing me all the antiques she had accumulated in her home. The whole dream took place in her home as she was showing me her antique collection. As I was being led around her house looking at her antiques, there were pets all over her house. They were dogs, cats, bears , just all sorts of animals some of which I could not even recognize or describe. But as This elderly lady was showing all her things, these animals of hers kept bumping into me,sniffing me, licking me,scratching me,tripping me and just making themselves a pain in the butt. They seemed to come out of nowhere, and there they were,everywhere I was walking. It got scary at times cause I did not know when I was gonna get scratched or bitten. They were in my way as if I was having to walk in a maze to avoid them. The lady kept having to grab my arm and pull me along just to keep up with her. These strange mix of animals just kept bothering and touching me. Like I said, this dream was one that lasted a few hours during my night. I woke up a few times but just slightly enough to fall right back to sleep several times and resume the same bothersome dream. When i finally did wake up for the day, which was around 4:30 am, I really was annoyed at why I had had such annoying and bothersome dream. When I began analyzing it I quickly realized that all the strange animals which kept bugging me as I went along were in fact all of my clients I deal with day in and day out. At this point I do a lot of charity work and the kids I mentor along with the addicts I work with, and their family too, are what I was encountering in my dream. The animals bugging me were in fact my clients in real life. Instead of running out of the elderly lady's home, I stayed there and was kind to the bothersome animals. I had done in my dream just as I do in my real life, I stayed and put up with all the animals. In real life I know that regardless of what time or what day someone reaches out to me for help, I am there, always. It sort of reminds me of what Bill Wilson calls the main principal of Alcoholics Anonymous. He says, "When someone reaches out for the hand of AA, yours will be there always". My hand is there always, "and for that I am responsible".
Sunday, January 4, 2009
The 5 factors that influence Alcoholism and Drug Addiction
Psychological, Physiological, Physical, Environmental and Economical factors which underlie all addictions.
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